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My night began as any other normal weeknight. Come home, fix dinner, and play with the. I then had the thought that would ring painfully in my mind for the next few hours: 'Maybe I should pull the waxing out of the medicine cabinet.' So I headed to the site of my demise: the bathroom. It was one of those 'cold wax' kits. No melting a clump of hot wax, you just rub the strips together in your hand, they get warm and you peel them apart and press them to your leg (or wherever -) and you pull the hair right off. No mess, no fuss. How hard can it be? I mean, I'm not a genius, but I am mechaniy inclined enough to figure this out. (YA THINK!?!) So I pull one of the thin strips out. Its two strips facing each other stuck together. Instead of rubbing them together, my genius kicks in so I get out the hair dryer and heat it to degrees. ('Cold wax,' yeah right!) I lay the strip across my thigh. Hold the skin around it tight and pull. It works! OK, so it wasn't the best feeling, but it wasn't too bad. I can do this! Hair removal no longer eludes me! I am She-rah, fighter of all wayward body hair and maker of smooth skin extraordinaire. With my next wax strip I move north after checking on the, I sneak back into the bathroom, for the ultimate hair fighting championship. I drop my panties and place one foot on the toilet. Using the same procedure, I apply the wax strip across the right side of my bikini line, covering the right half of my hoo-ha and stretching down to the inside of my butt cheek (it was a strip).. I inhale deeply and brace myself RRRRIIIPPP!!!! I'm blind!!! Blinded from pain!!!! .OH MY GAWD!!!!!!!!! Vision returning, I notice that I've only managed to pull off half the strip. CRAP! Another deep breath and RIPP! Everything is spinning and spotted. I think I pass out must stay conscious must stay conscious. Do I hear crashing drums??? Breathe, breathe OK, back to normal. I want to my trophy a wax covered strip, the one that has caused me so much pain, with my hairy pelt sticking to it. I want to revel in the that is my triumph over body hair. I hold up the strip! There's no hair on it. Where is the hair??? WHERE IS THE WAX??? looking for my lonely grannies teacher
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