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I watched as my x ate pills like skittles, and as much as I tried was unable to get her to go to get help. After 4 years of that I couldn't do it anymore and we got a divorce. I have been where you are, might not have been boose but the addiction was what it was. He is the only person that can deside to get help, sure you can be there for support. But you can't do it for him. The fact that he wants you to accept him the way he is tells me that he has no intention in changing. So you have a choice either realize that he always have this problem and live with it or run like hell. Recently I went on a date with a woman that as we sat down to dinner she started pulling out pill bottles, she could have done that in the ladies room but I'm glad she didn't, at the time I thought thier might be a, it was early but moving in the right direction right up to that point. And while I realize she might well need the medication seeing that just brought back painful memories. We had a nice dinner and conversation, went to the and about half way through out came the pills. I chose to end the evening after the ride back to her home, we talked about it on the way. Sure it could have went further, but I didn't the point and told her. I think the worse part was that she didn't offer any explaination although it probably wouldn't have made any differance. My point is that if you commit it's not going to get better, and you have more heartache in the future, and even if he does try to quit it's still going to be hard. Not to mention that he could work you into the same problem. You can only control what you do and the same goes for him, I'm not sure what your interest is in this, but if it is all about getting him to quit drinking you can't do that only he can, it sounds to me like he doesn't want to and you can't make him. Good luck seeking sex NewbergYou've been married for years and it seems like a "typical" marriage in that nothing's perfect but you get along and seem to generally be going in the same direction. Up to this point in your narrative the only thing I can that is wrong on any count is that you don't seem to be too head-over-heels about your wife and give no indication that you ever were. You say that you her but that she isn't sufficient in and of herself for you. Given this information (and what follows) perhaps you should consider an alternative lifestyle such as being single or discussing an open relationship with your wife. I don't often suggest this, but you just don't strike me as the monogamous type and I think your wife needs to be given the opportunity to decide for herself whether or not she can deal with you as you really are versus who she no doubt thinks you are. Looking back over missed opportunities only makes you human, cheating on your fiancee just before your wedding should have been your first clue that this whole married thing probably wasn't going to work out for you. The subsequent hook-ups (both pending and consummated) should be a further indication that you most likely weren't ready to get married when you did, at least not in the traditional sense. I strongly support the notion that the only rules to being married are the rules that the married couple themselves make at the time they get married (and adjust as necessary while they are married) but the rules need to be fair and they need to be discussed and agreed upon by both parties before implementing them. If you suggest to your wife that you both be allowed to have sex with other people and she agrees, in my mind you have carte so as you maintain yourself inside the parameters of the conditions she sets forth. If she doesn't agree you owe it to her and to yourself to either remain faithful to your wife or do the honorable thing and let her go so she can find someone who can build a more honest relationship with her. woman wants friend xxx
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