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Hi Firstly stop beating yourself up. Who are you in the inside? If you like that person than half the battle is won. I'm bi and was married for over 20 years. My husband loved hearing about my fantasies of other women and encouraged me to explore that side of myself. I did it alone and we played together some too. (this aspect of our lives had nothing to do with our divorce our sex life was actually one of the best parts of our marriage lol). And don't blame your weight on not being with a woman. I'm in a committed relationship with a woman now (going on years she's a lesbian and I'm bi) and she's very overweight. That's one great thing about women we really do care about what's going on inside (in my experience). There obviously has to be a sexual attraction but we're smart enough to know that having all the right parts and knowing how to use them is the really important thing. Sexy comes from within your attitude, your demeanor, your eyes, what you say, how you say it. Give yourself a break but be realistic. A new is a huge life-changing thing. My advice is to have a chat with your husband. If the is there, as you say, it should be easy to have a sit down with him and let him know how you're feeling. Getting on the same is paramount after that you can decide what direction to go. But remember no lying, no cheating that'll only cause huge problems. Good luck. want a massage no stringsthank y'all so much for the warm welcome! i really appreciate it! here is some info that make me seem more individual, rather than just a generic somebody right now i am reading the Teagarden mystery series by Charlaine. i highly recommend them! i like mysteries w/female protagonists. "Roe" is one of my favorites. she reminds me of me, except that i'm queer, not straight. she is a part-time librarian who lives in a small southern town. she is eccentric, an unexpected heiress and owner of a very fat cat named. i am a retired librarian, eccentric, and aunt of a very fat cat named heiress, alas! i have rediscovered Riot Grrl music and esp. like Sleater-Kinney. they rock! i also like Bitch and Animal, the Gossip, and the Butchies. Gaga really doesn't stir my musical soul. at the risk of having stones thrown at me, i'll say that i think she is mediocre and a knock-off. *going to hide under a very big shield* i am drinking rooibos (red leaf or red bush) tea. i teas and tisanes from all over the world. i have had a longing for some good quality rooibos ever since i read the # 1 Ladies Detective Agency series set in Botswana, Africa. Mma Ramotse, the protagonist drank it whenever she wanted to think. (can you tell that characters in books are very real to me?) i am eating, though not all at once, Smart Balance PB cracker sandwiches, Sing Buri or Chinese Chili, and hot buttered naan. also garlic triscuits and laughing cow cheese. and for a BIG treat Lindt Excellence dark chocolate w/a touch of french sea salt. yummmmm! oh, yes, appearance i have very short dark blonde hair, big blue eyes usually covered by dark grey librarian's glasses (glaucoma), very petite (my doc's ecstatic that i just broke lbs!), 5 ft tall, usually in lounging pants at home and dresses outside (i AM a femme, after all!), have a unique sense of style, very outre here in WV, and S wants to have my pic painted or drawn in the nude, except that He'd then have to kill the artist,lol. to Him, my most attractive features are my brains and my hands with slender fingers and nails. know me better now? k online sex chat
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