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crossdresser looking to date women and not to put you down whatsoever. You are faced with mental challenges yourself with dealing with his mental condition. Simple example to illustrate suppressing feelings, is a person who is at a party they really really don't want to be at. Even thought they don't say anything to the contrary, you can usually tell they are not enjoying themselves. Now the host (your SO) if they care about you must spend time worrying about you while dealing with everything going around them. Seek support groups that deal with term care giving as a possibility. You are exhibiting burn out. I certainly don't blame you, you are yourself going through a lot of stress as well. With illness in a couple, two are suffering. are you an extreme sort of woman
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