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all turtles are slow- even you. I want you to know that the decision I made did not come easy. I missed you and think of you often still. When I came over that night, I did not know what was to come. Running on instinct isn't always the best for me. I always remember those Thursday nights with a nostalgic longing. I wanted those nights back; for things to return to how they were. But this last time I realized that wasn't to be. It wasn't the same. I still haven't figured out why. Maybe it is because of all the ups and downs we have had. Or perhaps it was because I was conflicted about him. Whatever the reason I have chose to trust that things worked out the way they did for a reason. I know you disagree. I may be wrong. But I remain believing in the notion that 'if we were meant to be, then we would already be.' Plus, I do not want to short change him at all. He is a good man. We may have some communication failures at times and less passion than you and I, but he encourages me to pursue even when all I want to do is run. So for that I am grateful. He deserves more than I can give him. Especially since some of me will always be with you. I just pray this decision won't come with later regret.
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I am the one who left. We lived like a brother and sister and I can honestly say I am happier now than I have been my whole life. It's been awhile, almost 2 years. I have a life and boyfriend , he has a life and girlfriend. But the guilt that he was not ready eats me up. He did not want to be a single dad doing this on his own. He wanted a family , retirement and the whole nine yards. I was drowning and needed to be a good parent to my boys , which I am now. He lives 2 away and is a great dad , I feel I am a great mom. It just makes me sad when I drive over to a beautiful house I made him buy ( that he didn't want ) and I drop off my clothes and stuffed for the next few days and his reflection in the window doing this alone. This was my best friend and we just battled each other when the end was near He was angry, harassed me and I fought back to defend myself. How can you feel so happy and so sad at the same time ? That is something that eats at me daily. I hear the horror stories so I am not feeling sorry for myself. There was no cheating, no leaving me with to support on my own .. none of that. Just one that wanted out and the guilt I feel at times for not loving him the way he deserved haunts me. We were together for 14 years , bought houses together , had together. ect. I just couldn't do it. How do you get over hurting someone who is a good person and I am not referrring to the harassment during divorce. He did that out of anger. I actually took it in for a time and felt like I deserved it for leaving. We have no drama , just parent our and communicate but I am guilt ridden and it is a feeling that won't go away. flirt woman Norman Oklahoma women China hookup
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