I Should Have Told You By Now m4w I think I love you. I think about you every second of every day. When I fall asleep, my dreams are about you. When I wake up, I look at the empty pillow next to me and wish you were there looking into my eyes. I wish I could tell you how I really feel. I would have told you by now, but I didnt, and now Im afraid its too late.
My heart is what worries me, its the reason why I am scared to approach you. If we were already together and I hurt you, Id beg you for one more chance to make you fall in love with me. But the fact is I never had you I dont think I ever will. I hate the way I feel but at the same time love it so much. I see you every day, I talk to you every day. But the only way I will be fine is if I am with you,
I wish I could tell you but I dont want to scare you away from me, and I would rather see you and not be with you then to never see you again, because seeing you every day is a gift from God that I was blessed with. I guess I will never know how you feel unless I confess my love to you. Who knows you might feel the same about me. I really think I love you, I just dont know how to tell you.
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- wasn’t a fighter. He folded. He checked into a hospital, complaining of stomach problems, and resigned the appointment for “health reasons” months after Eisenhower’s inauguration. He was a pale, fleshy, thin-haired — sort of like Hoover, actually. And he was a bachelor. Like Hoover. He had never had a girlfriend, or seriously dated women. Like Hoover, seemed to spend all his free time with men. Hoover, after all, had lived with his mother until she died in , and by then, he was practiy inseparable from the natty, quiet Tolson, whom he had hired in and promoted meteoriy, making him associate director, the No. 2 position in the., in. J. and had separate offices and separate houses, but they had lunch together, dinner together, rode to work in Hoover’s car together, attended private dinners and receptions in Washington together, went to the horse races together, and vacationed in the same hotel suites together. By Hoover’s standards, if they hadn’t been the director and associate director of the., they would have been in its Sex Deviate files together, because there sure was a lot of talk about them. Hoover sent agents to squash the talk and threaten the talkers wherever it occurred. But at least they had each other. Eastwood’s film imagines a violent kiss between them, but my guess, as someone who loves men, is that they were never lovers. They weren’t built for it. They were too prim, too rigid, too Victorian. The only way Hoover could be comfortable in such a public relationship, I think, was because he knew it wasn’t sexual in private, whether he desired it to be or not. Hoover was too aware of the power of a secret. How could he permit anyone — even — to have something on him? As far as I know, Jr. never had a full relationship, either. What he had was an. file. He left Washington, moved to Coconut Grove, Fla., bought a house, drove a convertible, made extensive foreign policy visits to the Middle and Far East and, and became a popular lecturer on American foreign policy at the University of Miami. looking for a girl who knows a good time
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