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I read here a lot but am quiet. Most times I good advice. Scenario: Two, been together for 12yrs age difference is 9yrs between us. Ups and downs. Lots of downs. Few yrs ago we split for a year and a half… his drinking became too much and escalated to much more. After a year and a half we got back together. It’s been good; he has tried super hard to be the person I want and need (and the -) for the past. I know his past and understand his struggles. (even before we were together) Problems or feelings that i have now: I reverting back to old ways. Doing less and less with the family, less and less around the house and less and less does he pay attention to me. Slowly drinking has crept back into the picture. I've pointed it out and he's tried to squash it but still drinks. I feel as tho he only wants to drink, not spend time with the family, not do normal things. Like go to the park, go to events in town, have fun together and not drink. I feel as though I do 95% of all the work around the house and with the. We both work full time jobs outside of the home. I tell him these things and he says I’m crazy and he’s a completely different person than he was before. Is that true, yes it is true, but i how easily this can slip back to the bad place it was before. I kinda feel like he is selfish and only thinks abt himself and not anybody. I voice this, and once again I’m looking thru the looking glass that is old and not of new. I tell him abt other areas i feel he is super selfish in and he says "Deal with it" basiy. Do you think that i dont give him enough credit for trying super hard, and for how far he has come and I am only focusing on the bad and not the good, or do I have legit concern? How hard is it to really forgive somebody for all their past deeds and make a new? Is it me who needs to change my outlook on our life? Maybe this is all rhetorical women seeking men IcmelerPosted this in the queer forum, but thought I'd try this one as well. Honestly looking for feedback This is very difficult for me to admit, but here goes. I have been living in San for, years now. I "know" a lot of people but I do not have any true friends. I've been slugging it out alone for the past few years and feel like a total loser sometimes. I don't drink, don't do and therefore feel like I just don't fit into the world. I am so far from the "- scene" these days it's ridiculous. I feel like I just don't "fit in" with the world any more. I honestly don't know how to go about making friends. I never go out. Keep to myself. don't wish to re-establish any of my "old" friendships for various reasons which are not worth getting into. I used to be the one to initiate and cultivate friendships, but a few years ago I decided to try a little experiment to find out who my true friends were. I stopped initiating and, well, you can where that has gotten me. So I'd like to start over and meet new people, but I don't know how to do so. Here's the kicker, I've got a great job, work out regularly at the gym, and I am considered handsome, warm-hearted, funny and have been told times that I would make a great boyfriend or husband for someone. People are genuinely surprised to learn that I am single. Most people think I'm straight when they meet me. I don't know why I am so alone and lonely, but it's really starting to get to me. I would appreciate any suggestions, ideas, comments, etc. Thanks! local woman xxx
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