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I like your posts. I why some people are upset, but I also your excruciating conscientiousness about leaving. I can relate. One thing that worries me though. If I'm reading you correctly, when you think about divorce you imagine leaving the house other assets to your husband. You don’t seem to realize that denying yourself the proper division of assets would be a gargantuan mistake. It’d hurt your more than you know and lead to unpleasant complications later. I URGE you to get informed about the divorce process. Wish I could take you to lunch and go over the division of assets you are entitled to by law. Wish you'd talk to several divorced people about how they handled the interim because you are needlessly stressing yourself by assuming you'd walk with little but your savings the clothes on your back. We're not living in the Middle Ages. You don't have to go to a shelter. You get half the equity in your house. You and your husband's retirement accounts be split down the middle. A sane interim process CAN be arranged. Most divorce lawyers give free phone consults. They can give you ballpark info about all of the above and about the typical custody/- support practices in your county. I truly understand that you're in the middle of a hellish process. But you are making it by harder by remaining fuzzy self-sacrificing about what is rightfully yours. Divorce is about far more than emotions. Learn the facts. Get educated about the whole package. Put the emotional aspects on hold and focus on the practical, financial aspects of divorce NOT from the viewpoint of a martyr, rather from the viewpoint of what the legal system deems FAIR and appropriate. I know you're undecided. Still, I urge you to get informed. The decision be easier when you replace fears with facts. Learning there is a sane way out does NOT mean you have to take it. It's only smart to know the fire exits and how to use a fire extinguisher, even if you never have to use them. You might think about Codependents (CoDa) or AlAnon for codependency issues. Also, there be a Divorce for Dummies book or Nolo Press book worth perusing. Can't tell you often people over/under estimate divorce practicalities. Be SMART! You owe it to your. granny sex chipping Bainbridge
my wife and i separated this past. the house is in both our names, but it was in hers first since my credit rating bogged us down when we bought it. we refinanced about 5 yers ago and now i'm on title too. my credit rating is now stellar. she outearns me and has been the majority breadwinner in our family. my career changed paths about 4 yrs ago, from architecture to real estate, and my income suffered a great deal, but i had the blessing of my wife. i'm now back in architecture with a steady income, but still not nearly what my wife makes. anyway, the equity in our house is probably close to at least k. she doesnt think i deserve half of that in a buyout. i do and other friends i've spoken to agree with me. we live in oregon and one attorney friend that i spoke to said its a clean division, regardless of whos on the title or what the situation was when we bought it. another attorney i spoke to on the phone said there be a case for support too, but her paying me. neither one of us wants to make the first move here, but i don't us reconciling. we have a 6 yr old daughter. i don't anticipate any issues regarding custody, but the assets loom large. what are the chances of this thing working out in my favor? are males ever given half the assets in a situation like this, or are we just told "tough luck" and left by the wayside? my wife doesn't feel i deserve half the value of the house. i'm sure shes thinking somewhere in the 50k range, which is obscene and unfair. we both worked on fixing the house up together and put a lot into it. i need some feedback here. thanks. Etna Maine girls nakedThe wife wants a no fault divorce. This is recent, within the last month or two. We've been married 19 years. She stated her feelings toward me have changed and she wants to be happy. This doesn't make sense. I believe I do more then my fair share of "duties" around the house. Take care of the the two cars, take care of the "outside", as well as do most of the laundry, cleaning and cooking. At first I was shocked, then angry, now a bit depressed. We talked about going to a mediator for the division of assets and such. However, I don't want to get screwed, nor do I want to take advantage of her. Is it a good idea to consult an attorney? The only people that win in divorces is the attorney. dating site for married people
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