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I have been waiting for my boyfriend to propose for a time. Here's some background info: We have been dating exclusively for almost 3 years. We live together, share expenses, and even jointly own a cat. He is in his early 30s, and Im in my late 20s. We are both educated (doctoral-level education), and he runs his own business. The problem: I'm not really sure what the hold up is. We have talked about getting married passively in the past, but he seems very opposed to getting married any time. He says that he wants to me, but he's not ready to right now. To be fair, I also told him when we first started dating that (1) i wanted to get married before I am 30; and (2) i want to start a family when I turn 30. Going into the relationship, he never spoke any opposition. Nearly 3 years later, he has expressed that he is simply not ready for those things. That seems very reasonable, but I have been hearing the same line for about 2 years now. He says that we still have some kinks that we need to work out, etc. But honestly, I don't think it's reasonable to think that everyone who gets married has everything worked out %; otherwise, the divorce rate wouldn't be through the roof. Marriage is always a gamble with regards to whether it's going to really be "til death do us part." So, why won't he just take "the plunge?" really want to eatI feel your pain. And just like all the other ladies here said, it's a human thing, but it's a girl thing too. We're not socialized to be as. The reason you're getting hit on by men has nothing to do with what you look like. They'll hit on anything that moves! It's rough being a femme chick too, cuz you look straight so not only do girls not know that you'd desperately like them to hit on you but you're also not even welcome at the usual lesbian outs! I get the evil eye anytime I try to even walk into a lesbian bar unless I'm vouched for by a butch. Try meeting girls when you don't even look remotely queer. And believe me I've already cut off all my hair and dyed it purple so that's not helping. Anyways, I'm 24 and trying to make myself obvious in the queer community. I'm doing exactly what the other women have said, I'm getting involved. Organizations are not going to turn down volunteers, especially Queer non-profs. I've joined a local queer writing class, been a part of the local business association, volunteered for a bunch of other events. The point is, just show up. Go to Pride, check out the booths what interests you and ask if they need volunteers or how you could get involved. Find your talent or passion, are you into? Sports? Kareoke? figure it out and trust me there's a one out there. Then just show up. You'll make friends, maybe not quickly but it happen. Also, another great way to meet people; volunteer to mentor a queer youth. It's rewarding and trust me when you drop that line all the girls be lining up to out with you. It makes you a deeper person and it shows your commitment to the community and humanity in general. There is no one out there worth their salt who would not think you are an amazing person for spending your time mentoring people, especially queer ones. They need it. And they might remind you about what you have to offer as a wounderful and inspiring individual. Working with reminds me what I about myself and it help you remember what you about you. And those are the same things that other people about you too. If you think you don't have time to do any of the above, trust me you do. I do it working 3-4 jobs and trying to finish school. Easy? No. Worth it? Absolutely. Try it, you might like it. sensual massage
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