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If you have and a family together, then no, I don't think you should tell him. The guilt is yours to bear, and that is your punishment (if you really feel guilty which you should). If you don't have, and aren't married they HELL YES you tell him! You effed up, and he deerves to know! You're robbing him of his dignity if you don't, and that's vile. X fucking a Eindhoven girlbut it sounds like neither of you has tried at all to reconcile. You simply have decided that the marriage is over and the only course of action is to come up with the best divorce. It seems from your posts that nothing really bad happened to precipitate all of this you simply have grown tired of each other and decided that the grass is greener elsewhere and are chalking it up to getting married. I'm simply suggesting you try. Rather than be hurt and humiliated that he has suggested a divorce, consider that he really is simply saying the same things you are feeling. Take that as communication, not humiliation. Try to get him to go to counseling to explore with you what has happened, what might make it better. If he won't then go by yourself. don't make divorce so easy. Perhaps through the process of having to work to end it both of you might decide it is better to work to save it. My view is that your has two parents who should make every effort to save the family. If it was something threatening your -'s future (an illness, a pervert, a bear, etc.) and your husband could/wouldn't help you fight it you would do it by yourself. So fight Clearly the father has decided to take the easy (for him) route out. don't look at it as humiliating yourself to keep your husband. Look at it as being willing to humble yourself for a period in an attempt to save your -'s family. That is not humiliating. That is heroic. female wants females
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