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We were married for 13 years, got divorced and maintained seperate households, shared custody of. I was a drunk (reason for divorce) but got serious about sobriety while single. She started showing interest and we dated for a year, then I moved back in. We did not get remarried just because we felt like that was a jinx. We stayed together like a married couple for 21 more years, and I found out that she had been having a sexual affair for almost two years. She had presented herself as divorced and she got taken up on it. Little by little I watched her become a floozy and a liar. This time SHE was the drunk and it has totally ruined her personality as far as I'm concerned. I tried desperately to win her back, to get her to end the affair, and she repeatedly told me that she had, and that I was her only. I caught her red-handed times, that last of which I took a picture of her car in his driveway. I confronted her that night (she came home 5 hours later with her hair and clothes totally messed up, and she was drunk), and she said it wasn't her car! I told her I wouldn't talk to her again until she was ready to come clean. She said "whatever". I stayed another days while I was making arrangements to get out. She never once tried to get honest with me, and I left her 20 days ago. She is going to the bf in two months, according to my granddaughter. She tried to me for support, but since we never remarried, she gets nothing unless I do it voluntarily. I was being a hardass, no communication, no money, but the truth is I need those house payments made or it's my neck on the line. I'm doing a lot of hard thinking, but from my perspective, getting back together was the very worst 21 years of my life. looking for a bff fwb both in one
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