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both for the words of wisdom. I am always open to constructive criticism. It's just a tough situation. Been fighting the fight for years. I document and save everything. I refuse to talk to her on the phone unless she agrees to have it recorded, otherwise I have no proof of her attitude. I keep it to text/- and I save/print out everything with a big ole folder with her name on it. I had a "custody conference" last week that was a joke. I was told that the only way the custody order would change (for me to have more time) is if she agreed to it, otherwise a court hearing was in order. Of course she wouldnt agree, why would she? I said my piece in the conference though. I keep doing what I am doing. Eventually if my is anything like his father, and he wonder and ask more and more question on why I am not there as often as I should be. He already does and hes only 4. When he's old enough to understand I show him the folder I have been keeping. If/when he wants to come live with me, I welcome it with open arms. But i wont be an asshole and refrain him from seeing his mother either. Parents (mother or father) who use as a pawn are just hurting the to try and gain any last drop of control that they lost along with the divorce. End of rant, sorry guys. Sometimes this stuff just flows off my finger tips and its hard to stop in mid-thought. married guy seeks phone texting relationship
the plan is. But he actually ends up making his own choices about where he wants to be a lot of the time based on what is going on in his life. I guess if I graphed it out he is probably here more. We don't live very far apart, though. It has been important to me that my have a voice in what he wants/needs some days he wants his mom some days he wants his dad. amatuer wives the KielAs they are older, they are better able to understand the reasoning, but don't kid yourself into thinking that your won't be affected. A divorce starts a constant round of "where do we spend the holidays, and can we invite Dad's girlfriend or Mom's new husband without it turning into a free-for-all?" One of my -'s friends is 23, and his parents just divorced he is devestated. At Christmas, he came to our house, in tears, because he realized that he'll never have the same family holidays. There is uncertainty as to what is a good relationship he thought he knew, but now he's not so sure. If your wife doesn't that lack of intimacy is ALSO a huge betrayal, then your wife is living in la-la land. I say this, though: women shut down when they feel that sex is being "demanded". It's a contrarian thing: The last thing they have control over is their body, and what can go in it :-) What would happen, do you think, if you just said, "OK, you win no more sex" and just smiled? Stop asking for it, stop hinting at it, don't touch her, etc. No cuddling at night, no coming up behind her in the kitchen and playing grab-ass, etc. I'm betting that a steady month of ignoring her sexually might turn on a switch in her. Right now, she has the satisfaction of knowing that she is wanted and desired and that be all she wants. Take that away Another thing to think about: Does she have a body image problem? (., has she gained weight over the years and just doesn't feel sexy?) She be avoiding intimacy because she's ashamed of her body and feels like if SHE doesn't like her body, then how can anyone? Ergo, anyone who wants to have sex with her is only using her for sex, because how could they possibly be getting any real pleasure out of her body the way it is? (I did't say it was logical but it's a possibility). I'm not reducing this completely to "I want sex and I want it now." ANY husband OR wife wants to feel desired by their partner, and enjoys knowing that their attentions are welcome. It's one of the perks of marriage. Sex is an important part of that intimacy in a marriage. Getting sex "on the side", however, would probably rip your marriage apart sounds like your wife already has trust issues, why inflame them? chat sex
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