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Last weekend I renewed a very old friendship. I’m bi-curious and I’ve got a very old friend that I’ve known since we were and we started exploring together when we were in our early teens. We’ve been friends a time and get together from time to time over the years. We’ve fooled around a good bit, mainly trading massages, JO’s and BJ’s. He moved away about 6 years ago and I haven’t seen him since. I got a from him about two weeks ago saying that he was going to be hunting at his grandfathers farm over the weekend and asked me if I wanted to come. I said sure. He said he’d be at the cabin Friday night and to when I was ½ hour out. His grandfather’s farm is about 3 hrs away from me and that cabin is on a lake about 30 from where we went college. A lot of partying and fooling around of all kinds went on in that cabin during our wild college days. I was really excited to be seeing him again and could barely contain myself as the week went by. Friday morning came and I trimmed the bush and shaved the dog and puppies. I tossed my bow and the rest of my hunting gear in the trunk and headed into work. The day absolutely crawled by. When 3:00 hit I was off to the car heading to the farm. My mind was focusing on other thoughts. I was really hoping we could pick up where we had left off, so I barely remember the drive. I ed when I was 30 minutes out and before I knew it I was driving down the dirt road and pulling up to the cabin. I opened the door and went in. He was standing by the kitchen counter. He was wearing a pair of black silky clingy boxers that did nothing to hide his package. He was still damp from a shower and had a towel draped across his shoulders. His chest was shaved and he obviously had been working out since the last time I saw him. “Wow”, I said “You’ve been working out. You look good.” He said “Thanks, you look good yourself what’ve you been doing” “Oh, I started mountain biking in the and I’ve managed to drop 25 pounds so far” He said, “That’s great, it shows. I’ve run you a hot bath why don’t you go jump in and I’ll bring you a drink” handsome guy wants to share his sack with a horny girl
I'm trying not to repeat myself over and over, trying to hide how shitty I feel, because I know it just push him away, or throw dirt in the face of what he's currently expressing to me. I really wish I weren't like this. :/ All I can do is "fake it til you make it," it seems like. All I can do is just act like everything's as it ought to be until it is. I'm just afraid I'll never let go, never be able to believe him for an extended period of time. And that it come up someday in an argument, try as I might to avoid that type of thing. It's a flaw of mine, dredging. :( Last night when we had sex, he wanted me to mount him and I couldn't bear the idea of doing so. I couldn't bear looking at him while crushing him with my weight and being "in control." I just don't know what the hell is wrong with me. I know all the right ways to tell OTHER people to confront and overcome these feelings, but when I tell myself these things, it all rings so hollow. I guess I just can't get away from myself, and I am my own merciless enemy. signal horny girls in CorinthThe dumptruck has a tailgate which is hinged on the top, and it's HEAVY STEEL, maybe 5' tall x 7' wide. So when he slid down, his body slammed the tailgate, pushing it open just enough to wedge his body between tailgate and bed of the truck. A pile of dirt/mud was beneath him, true, but that impact against the tailgate is what worried me that and the sharp tools sliding with him and the compressed discs in his back for which he's been getting medical treatment and supposed to be taking it easy. He's no 20-something anymore. He's a 52-yo carrying too extra pounds. He made all doorways in our house 36" wide for a reason so a wheelchair could pass through easily. He's already built the wheelchair ramp to the front porch. Guess who he imagines might be in that wheelchair? How about the time he loaded a skid-loader onto a trailer, which didn't have a roll-bar so he stood beside it handling the steering. The tires on his side were MORE THAN HALFWAY off the ramps, and steering further off. It barely made it onto the trailer. The thing weighs about pounds. All that is fine for him, but he had it hooked onto a winch, which was pulling the machine up the ramps onto the trailer. He had ME pushing the "on" button for the winch, and even though I yelled that the tires were coming off the ramps, the winch was pulling it crooked, he yelled back to keep going. It's not so much that he does things which could hurt himself, what bothers me is that he enlists MY HELP to do these things which could hurt him. He thinks he's invicible, because he wrecked a motorcycle doing mph and got up and rode it home. He fell off a bulldozer and broke vertebrae in his back, 3 months in traction, and he's still walking. But yeah, maybe I do worry too much about these safety issues. *Sigh* I suppose I just need to grow a thicker skin and nonchalant attitude about it all. But I don't know how. local married women
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