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As the billions of you out there who live to read my posts already know I am a 50 year old virgin. Unfortionately I havent had a girlfriend before at all assuming you dont count the one I never actualy met but who the judge told me to stay away from or the bag with the glass eye who used to attack me when I brought her soup . Anyway I attribute it to looking like an obese orangoutang. Turns out most women are not into bestiality with a ginormous drunken primate with a small cock. However though I be classified as a complete puff of a virgin, technicaly I am not! I am infact a rampant stud as I have paid hookers to accept my repulsive pink, red and purple cock complete with a nasty hairy mole on the flank up them. However I have even sucked so badly at sexiness that I have even disappointed a trick turning crack ho. Last I hired a I found in SF and took her in my truck to a vacant parking lot. She had a weird shaped head I re and was fat as a walrus. Anyway, I pulled out Mr and she tugged at him. After 10 sad minutes, he still wasnt standing at attention so she changed hands and lit a smoke with her free hand. After another 10 minutes of horrid silence, a nasty squishy cock and both of us now looking out the window to the squidging sound of her fist somewhat angrily dragging my fiveskin 3 inches over my Gelmit and then slamming it back into my balls she stopped and we sat sadly arround my cock. "Fuck this!" she kindly said to me. "You must be a fucking fag give me my fucking money and fuck you" she added. Snatching $ out of my chubby fingers then flipping me the bird and storming off leaving me and my flapping about in my truck The moral of the story is that all that glitters is not gold. No thats not it. What I mean is that two birds in the hand are worth one in the bush. No thats not it either. Anyway, I think YOU know what I mean going to the magic Virginia Nebraska tonight
WHEN I was yet but a, the gardener gave me a tree, A little slim elm, to be set wherever seemed good to me What a wonderful thing it seemed! with its lace-edged leaves uncurled, And its span stem, that should grow to the grandest tree in the world! So I searched all the garden round, and out over field and hill, But not a spot could I find that suited my wayward. I would have it bowered in the grove, in a close and quiet vale; I would rear it aloft on the height, to wrestle with the. Then I said, "I cover its roots with a little earth by the door, And there it shall live and wait, while I search for a place once more." But still I could never find it, the place for my wondrous tree, And it waited and grew by the door, while years passed over me; Till suddenly, one fine day, I saw it was grown too tall, And its roots gone down too deep, to be ever moved at all. So here it is growing still, by the lowly cottage door; Never so grand and tall as I dreamed it would be of yore, But it shelters a tired old in its dappled shade, The -'s pattering feet round its knotty knees have played, Dear singing birds in a storm sometimes take refuge there, And the stars through its silent boughs shine gloriously fair. Rowland Sill woman needed to pound me with strapon dildofor 2 hungry cats making more noise that I could sleep through. Must be rough having to get up to go to a job. I seem to re them days. Think I’ll have some nice breakfast then lounge out in the tree house and talk to birds this morning. You all have a good day at …(giggle) work (tee -) girls sex
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