Grad student stress-relief and support m4w Hi, I'm a graduate student and new to Pittsburgh. I'm looking for someone similar either a graduate student, upper-level undergrad, or young professional leading this high-stress, demanding life of ours as a relaxation companion. I'd like someone who can be friends when we need each other, but low-commitment and understanding when one of us is too swamped to spend time with the other. We should be able to talk and listen with each other, vent to one another, have a few drinks together, cuddle and relax, trade massages, and yes, if the attraction is there, sleep together. We should be able to be everything the other needs to feel relaxed and mentally healthy. So if you're stressed and don't want to be, if you're a good listener and need to be listened to sometimes, if you give a good back rub or want a foot massage while you complain about your advisor or boss, write me. I'm friendly and welcoming I'm just a bit shy, which is why I'm on CL.
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He was 29 when you married him, you were 19, just entering adulthood. He left his mommma's house and molded you into his new momma. And you took the bait, hook, line, and sinker. He does the bare minimum to justify his existence. He "keeps an eye on the -" (when he's able to tear himself up from his video games now and then), while you manage all of the adult responsibilities, at work and at home, alone. You come home and do all the housework. You enable a dependent in a -'s body, and even worse, your are watching this piss-poor example set by both you and your husband. Your examples teach them that mothers do everything, and fathers are deadbeat users. If you don't break the pattern for yourself, do it for them. Now, if he managed homemaking like a SAHD who took the job seriously, that would be honorable. He's not even pretending to. You know it, he knows it, and sadly, the know it, too. What, did you fall asleep in the tanning bed or something? Forget that marriage is supposed to be a partnership? How can you say he's always been a freeloader, but you him? What's to? You've created a monster. He feels entitled to ride on your back and live off of your labors for the duration. He won't change his behavior until you change yours. You want real change? Set a deadline. Put him on notice. Either he gets a job in one month, and he remains employed, or he packs up his things (minus the video games) and moves in with his momma. You didn't sign up for that job, and you quit. He should understand that concept. He quit working a time ago. Or, you can go on with business as usual. how the lasts as your resentment grows. If you choose that option, cross your fingers, and the are smart enough to imprint on better examples of what, marriage, and parenting can be, and should be. Sorry to whack you upside the head, but you know these things already. It's only a question of whether you're ready to act on it. 25 for cool chick tonight
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