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What does any of this have to do with the physical location from which I responded to this guy's? What then would you deem an appropriate line of questioning on his part if I'd been writing from, say, the local Starbucks? "Are you having biscotti with your latte?" As I said, I gave him the rough coordinates of my office because he said he was staying in a hotel a few blocks away. He introduced an invasive note by requesting my information while proffering none of his own. In my shoes, would you have given him your specific information? Not sure how often you meet up with people online for play dates, but in my experience, the level of detail he was requesting far exceeded what is usual. As to our meeting jeopardizing any cases in his firm or mine, you should be aware that we are governed by strict confidentiality, and as such would only discuss our work in general terms, if at all. There’s no rule against people from opposing firms associating on a social basis. It happens all the time, in fact. As everyone understands, any meeting that begins online carries with it certain risks. As such, it is prudent to meet for a coffee or a drink first in a public place. But requiring someone’s curriculum vitae as a condition for meeting seems a bit extreme. Finally, have you considered that people these days have ONLY a mobile phone? any girls looking for a night off stressThe narcissist lacks empathy. Consequently, he is not really interested in the lives, emotions, needs, preferences, and hopes of people around him. Even his nearest and dearest are, to him, mere instruments of gratification. They require his undivided attention only when they "malfunction" when they become disobedient, independent, or critical. He loses all interest in them if they cannot be "fixed" (for instance, when they are terminally ill). People find the narcissist "cold", "inhuman", "heartless", "clueless", "robotic or machine-like". Early on in life, the narcissist learns to disguise his socially-unacceptable indifference as benevolence, equanimity, cool-headedness, composure, or superiority. "It is not that I don't care about others" he shrugs off his critics "I am simply more level-headed, more resilient, more composed under pressure They mistake my equanimity for apathy." The narcissist tries to convince people that he is compassionate. His profound lack of interest in his spouse's life, vocation, interests, hobbies, and whereabouts he cloaks as benevolent altruism. "I give her all the freedom she can wish for!" he protests "I don't spy on her, follow her, or nag her with endless questions. I don't bother her. I let her lead her life the way she sees fit and don't interfere in her affairs!". He makes a virtue out of his emotional truancy. All very commendable but when taken to extremes such benign neglect turns malignant and signifies the voidance of true and attachment. The narcissist's emotional (and, often, physical) absence from all his relationships is a form of aggression and a defense against his own thoroughly repressed feelings. In rare moments of self-awareness, the narcissist realizes that without his input even in the form of feigned emotions people abandon him. He then swings from cruel aloofness to maudlin and grandiose gestures intended to demonstrate the "larger than life" nature of his sentiments. This bizarre pendulum only proves the narcissist's inadequacy at maintaining adult relationships. It convinces no one and repels. professional dating services
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