Rambling A over a year ago, I passed up the chance of having the one person I always wanted, because I wanted my freedom. I wanted just myself again, afer years of trying to love someone else, who was determined to erase my existence I guess we could say. I said mean, heartless things that I regret.I was drowning in mid air trying to the reality of everything happening around me, that I hurt the one person I never wanted to hurt. I think back to those conversations a lot of times I just want to cry, how could I let someone break me down so badly, that all I could say to the one person I actually loved was harsh, shattering words? How in the world did I let things get so out of control, that I couldnt even control myself? Then the hundreds of memories of the love I so wanted flashes through, its just.. a hurricane of mixed emotions.. Then I block everything out, its too overwhelming for me to deal with. Tears are not something I wish to shed. I couldnt apologize even though I want to, nothing I could say or do, could erase what I said and did. Time doesnt rewind, there are no do overs. All that because at the time, I wanted myself and my freedom. Well I got my freedom and myself. Turns out I've too much freedom these days. Most nights I lay awake with a thousand memories, words, or just random thoughts rambling through my mind, to fall asleep and dream of the love I once upon a time knew. I guess the upside is I dont dream every night, well not that i always re, but these days its that I sleep. Its crazy to me, that I gave up the chance because I wasnt exactly sure if what I believed I wanted was what I wanted or thoughts of someone else. Makes no sense im sure. But now that I've had this year to myself, the freedom of doing whatever I please, no one hounding me, or trying to change who I am, Ive realized a lot of things. Like that I always changed what I said I wanted in a guy over the years.. example "I don't like little guys I like bigger guys". Only I wasnt cl Array looking for the right guy modestoTruck Driver's Dream :) I am looking for truck driver's that are far from home and wanting some company for a little while :) I can meet you in or around the Grenada area. Text sixsix2 eight0 4eight5 i need a female sex chat Bonn japanese dating services
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Waiting for You! I'm not perfect, far from it. I may not have the perfect answers for your questions, I may not be the sweetest girl at all times. But I'm real. And I have feelings. And I want to love and be loved. I like to listen to NPR, and then in a heartbeat listen to Green Day and Evanescence and Country. I love all things wine. I'm a beer snob. I love the outdoors. I love to travel and see the ocean. I LOVE to laugh and have a good time. I like to get dressed up and go out. I really don't think I'm that hard to handle.. most days :-) I'm in the midst of a divorce and have 2 who are my world and come first in everything. I'm not looking for a hook-up or a one night stand. That's not my thing. I'm looking for someone who is going to treat me well. Be honest with me and not try to sleep with me in the first date. Someone to woo me :-). Does that still exist? lol So, if you want to talk, I'd love it. I promise I'm real! I promise you won't be let down. Please send a with your reply and I'll send one back to you. Put "WAITING FOR YOU" in the subject line so I know that you're not spam! webcam sex Vineyard HavenCould you be my prince charming? I'm not really sure what to say here, I've never done this sort of thing before. I'm a 24 white female. I love to have fun and try to not take life so serious at times. I'm a college graduate with a full-time job and I absolutely love my job. I'm passionate about the things I love in life. And I'm very close to my family. I love sports (football, baseball hockey), the beach, shopping, spending time with family and friends, watching a good movie, relaxing, working out, cooking and cleaning The list could go on! I'm very mature for being only 24. Possibly it's because I've been through a lot in my life. It's taught me to fight for what I believe in and to NEVER give up. I'm looking for a possible long term relationship. I'm not into the that most women play. I don't have time for that. I want my other half to be my best friend. And I won't settle for less than I deserve. Military men drive me wild :) Anyways, if you want to say hi, don't be shy. Send me a and a little bit about yourself. Also put your height in the subject line so I know you aren't spam!! Hope to hear from you soon! mature women in Fayette United States chinese sex chat
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Looking to meet new faces to help stay positive and become a better me Just moved back home after a 4 year relationship with a guy who I now only care for as my friend yet stayed with, out of fear of being alone.I thought I was just getting older and that there was no one else for me because before him I didn't have much luck with guys.I'm trying to put myself first now because my biggest downfall was putting him first and I forgot to take care of me to be.even though me and him have recently broke up our relationship as a couple was always breaking up and getting back together we thought at one point we wanted it to work but hurt each other in the process and that just led to not loving each other like lovers but caring about each other only as friends.I need to get myself more friends and enjoy life for me I'm 27 and have no. and even though I thought that time is running out for me its not I just haven't used my time correctly
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