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RE: what can you take, half of everything acquired during the marriage is yours basiy the courts total up the assets (assigning estimated/fair market value to things. furniture) and you get half. Agreed with other posters AN ATTY BEFORE LEAVING THE HOUSE. You're better off to stay put and have him leave if you want to have the another reason to an atty get the custody thing straightened out you can get a temporary custody order without a lot of hassle I've seen on this board where it can be done without notice but this is just temporary you two have to work out the details. If you do decide to just leave, make sure you have an itemized list of assets tangible and $$$ get all account #'s, Social Security, Credit Cards, Mortgage, Cars, other real property, bonuses coming up, stock, checking and savings accounts. You're only going for HALF but when it comes to cash, you want to take your half before you leave the house. You also want to freeze the credit cards, and take your name off the checking and savings accounts so he can't kill your credit. Itemizing furniture etc this usually is not that big of a thing if you take it, he'll just get new stuff. Take a video or pix of what you do have itemize big stuff- for little stuff. waffle irons, you can just generalize as Kitchenware. For something big. plasma TV, Laptops, ANYTHING over $1K and if you want to be safe, anything over $ , just list what's there and what you took. Really the furniture/TV stuff is generally not the big thing. Once again the other stuff IS the big thing and you NEED to an atty before even packing. men on the El Portal California xxxFirst you have to identify, even vaguely, what the problem is. Then flip a coin to who goes first. It's like a tennis game. The first one outlines the problem. Keep it as short as possible. The other person has to paraphrase in their own words what the first person said, to the first person and keep it up until the first person agrees that the other "gets it right". Then it's the other person's turn to make their case and the first person has to paraphrase in their own words what the other person said until the other person agrees that the first person "gets it right". Volley that ball back and forth for an hour and you both understand the situation sooo much better than a straight forward power struggle to plow your way to the finish line. At that point it ain't over, but it's probably 60% down the road to a conclusion. With that behind you, odds are in your favor that the two of you can find a solution, without drawing blood, that you both can live with. It tugs on your empathy rather than anger. Give it a shot. find local swingers
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