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That's not to say we didn't ever argue; we did but it was rare and didn't lead to these despair feelings just arguments but never to the point of breaking up/threatening to break up, more of an exchanged point of view. Reactive EXACTLY how it feels we had a great relationship (sad to think of using it in the past tense). We were (and most of the time still are) each other's biggest champion, helping each other, working together to solve problems, just enjoying each other, etc. He's my favorite person in the world. I def read the books you suggest. I look into cognitive therapy, heck, I clearly need to talk to a trained professional if I'm even contemplating a divorce from the I -/our little 2 person family. And spot on: I'm guilty of talking about divorce, not him (I've brought it up twice). Not threatening it, but I get your point and know I shouldn't. And at least I recognize the need to shut up I honestly knew I did it but never knew how much it bothered him, he didn't want to make a big deal and now he's clearly been stewing on it for some time. Really appreciate all of your comments and your time, thank you. kitten looking for some attention seeking older female for intimacy
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