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Ends Feeling depressed, middle aged, can't go to a psych because it marks you for life with a record (bad for employment). Would like to exchange , need someone to motivate me back to life. 40-50 preferred. I am prior military, in a end but good paying job that I hate but can't afford to lose, I work a lot of hours. I am married. By the time I get home the wife is going to sleep and she is doing her own activities. Actually even another male (I'm not gay), would be fine to. I am not looking for NSA, what is that the national security agency? I can't drink for reasons, and I am in fairly good shape (I can run 3 miles easily and can do pullups), but would like to lose about lbs. Need motivation for the gym, life in general. I have a love hate relationship with politics and don't pick sides, I can't stand either side right now, but saw good things from both sides in the past. I would like to try some day but never have. I am not from here but spent the last 15 yrs here. I had a potential male friend who is married but he was really touchy, as in touching me all the time and it made me a little uncomfortable, the final straw was when I was benching and he spotted me and put his crotch in my face and the intentions were obvious, sorry, just not turned on by gays. I would like to get into or something for meditation but lack motivation and ambition.
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