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I think it fulfills a persons need to feel that they are powerful and can effect someone. If someone was a loser before you met them and they improved in life you can attribute that to them being with you. logiy or not thats how humans rationalize it. If they are already a well put together person there its no potential for that need to get fulfilled. Thus you are not as attractive to them if they have a strong drive in this power need. This its generally defined as co-dependence. Or having or needing to use someone to get your own internal needs met. Your ex had an early experience that made her feel very powerless so she is doing her best to try and get that need met any way she can. No matter how times someone tells her there is no pot of gold at the end of that road this is that only way she can think of to get the need met. Van Buren sex tape
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