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when they're "the one," you just know. I felt that with my now ex it just felt "right" to be with the person and you can't imagine living your life without them in it (with you). Little did I know I was marrying a narcissist. Now I'd probably second guess every gut instinct I have with a guy, but I guess that's normal for growing in life. 33 male looking for older mature womenThe problem, as mentioned, is that when all the posts are identical because only one type of discussion is encouraged, I've just skipped every post on the forum. As to your Polyanna spin on the world, again, I must disagree. You say that those who talking endlessly about ourselves as bragging feel badly about their own lives? I don't find that the case. From what I can tell, the women on here who keep a low profile in terms of talking about their own accomplishments are the ones who have the strongest sense of self and who consistently have the most achievements under their belts. They simply don't need to curry feedback from others about that, because that motivation comes from within, not from outside. I also don't think it is false humility. From what I can tell, those women have achievements under their belts precisely because their standards are very high (they are their own greatest critics, in other words), and so any sense of humility is not false, it is very real. They can be simultaneously proud of what they've done while secretly thinking they probably could have done better. So why crow about something that was good but not GREAT? On the other hand, those who only feel good if they have others sticking their noses halfway up their asses seem to me of highly questionable self-esteem. Encouraging that kind of behavior is not positive. Additionally, you seem to think that bragging about shit gives positive motivation because you are talking about something good. I again must disagree, at least in part. Talking about good things does boost people, but talking about YOURSELF does NOT, because it gives other people nothing to latch onto or add of their own. It is a monologue, not a discussion. It is not generous. It is selfish. What if someone doesn't give a shit about gyms? If that's the ONLY good thing you can ever talk about, you have done NOTHING for that other person except bored them to tears. To repeat this is why multiple forms of discourse are necessary. Because not everyone wants to have some creepy ass sycophantic, robotic interaction to feel good about themselves. For some of us, it is HIGHLY NEGATIVE AND UNCOMFORTABLE BECAUSE IT SMACKS OF THE GROSSEST HETERONORMATIVITY. As queers, can we really I mean REALLY not the problem with demanding everyone act the same. Really? Holy. Fuck. girls for sex
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