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lonely. Think about it. Does that make sense? Loneliness is something we don't like, same with sadness or loss. The problem lies when we FEAR it. There is a way to be alone that worked for me. I dedicated myself to it. I made damn sure that I did all the things that would have me embrace being alone. No, I didn't WANT to be alone and I didn't want to be lonely..but I knew I couldn't make my choices out of the fear of being alone. If I did that how could I ever expect to make smart ones? I'd be a phony. So I made a pact, a pact with ME. I was not going to eat cookies and say I'm trying to lose weight. I was going to get mentally (physical has never been too big of an issue with me, but if you need it cover that too) and no matter how it took I was going to accomplish that. So I set about making a plan to accomplish it..no I didn't have it all set before I began. Action was KEY..act now. I made sure I had regular counseling check ups, a way to hold myself accountable really, accountable for doing the things I knew I needed to do. I picked some things that got me out of the house and DID THEM. I chose new things, something to learn, something I had talked about doing and never made myself do. Something that forced me into a new social setting and agreed NOT to discuss my problems. To act like the person I wanted to be..how I pictured the finished produckt. I compartmentalized my life pity party time was with my counselor or at times of MY chosing and when the time was up, it was UP. Done, finished and off to doing something. I made sure I lived in a positive setting. Dishes were done, house clean and the yard taken care of. Car maintained and no slacking off..it kept me busy. I seized my freedom by the throat. I bought food for ME. Cooked meals I liked, drank what I liked to drink and sometimes on a friday night..I went fishing, just because and slept under the stars..I did it when Friday morning I had NO idea what I was going to do. I was asked if I would sky dive and said YES..and WENT. and I stuck to it especially when I didn't want to. In that I MADE my life. Try it out. casual sex Malaga
I have been reading thru the divorce posts . with so much negativity I thought reminder of what your working toward be a nice change. Its very hard to a life of happiness and prosperity when your in the midst of a divorce. Its a slow, agonizing and expensive process which leaves you at times feeling like your standing on the edge. Its a hard thing in the middle of all that to say I am going to take care of the things I need for me to come out the other side more well adjusted then when I went in but it can be done. Your already weeding out what in life that is holding you back you might as well take the time for self reflection and improvement otherwise your chances of ending up right back where you are now are good. Once its over and your ready to move on to finding the you were looking for all along and just happened to find in the wrong person, remember that not everyone is your ex. Your now a little more guarded and jaded, its important to acknowledge this and work on not punishing others for the sins of someone. Find the old counter productive patterns you have had in choosing the partners that you have .. choose to resist them!!! Here is to hoping you someday find someone that makes you think "wow this is how its supposed to be" Who puts you 1st before themselves as you for them as well. Always remember happiness is a state of mind and you have to make the choice to be happy despite the cards life has dealt you!!! can you keep a relationship secretI know that people in my life me that way but it's not really the case. I'm so not fearless I have done wild things but do I take my time preparing for them. And I always have a saftey net set up for myself. Nerve is impressive. Double edge sword though, too much nerve can lead to mistakes, rash decisons. Wonder what ever became of her. women dominating men
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