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I came from a very troubled childhood and put the "d" in dysfunctional when it came to relationships. I was very successful in my career by day, crying at my therapist's office on the weekends. I had a concept of what the "right" relationship was for me, the "right" person and as a result kept ending up with all sorts of people that could not have been more wrong for me. I mean, on paper it all looked great but in reality not so much. I met this guy. He was SO not my idea of the "right" guy. Not my type, similar childhood issues, same industry (which I had avoided like the plague) and just "wrong" all over the place in my silly mental reasoning. But we got each other like no one I had ever met. We dated for a bit, I could he it was getting serious FAST and I was terrified. TERRIFIED. I broke it off with him and somehow, we remained friends. But REALLY friends. I then went out with another "right" guy after which ended as surely as anyone watching would have supposed it would. I knew at that point, my "type" was all wrong for me. I knew then I was really bad at picking the one for me. The relationship with "right" guy ended SO bad that my friend, Mr. Wrong, came over with some strawberry ice cream to talk. And I realized how grateful I was for his friendship. How much we knew about each other's darkest secrets. How MYSELF I felt with him. Over the next months, we became intimate. It was hot and heavy but in my mind, we were still "just friends". Then, one day (in bed, no less) he told me he couldn't keep seeing me. He told me he had never stopped loving me and his emotions would not allow him to just be friends now that sex was also in the mix. He told me "I don't know if this work out and neither do you but I'm willing to take that and that's what I am asking from you a. Or that we end this now." I took a few minutes while my mind swirled around in panic mode and in a moment of clarity understood that I was what was standing in the way of having. I loved him, he loved me. As a friend and now as a lover, he was actually not only not "wrong" for me but maybe the only TRULY right guy I had ever dated. I gave our relationship that 18 years ago. It's been 16 years of marriage and I am grateful every day that my best friend gave ME that second. I vote give him a. horny matures LecceI agree that it be something worthwhile to share with your other, however, a few caveats from my own thoughts: If you do share it, don't share it with the motive or expectation that sharing it mean "oh cool, let's bring a third person into the bedroom." Share it because you're looking to open up about what would be otherwise a very closely held thing. the sharing as intimate, something you're entrusting your partner with. You are the best judge of your significant other's thoughts on same sex relationships and bedroom activities. If she's staunchly conservative and mainstream about these things, then you have a couple of choices keep it to yourself if it might jeopardize the relationship or very slowly over time open her mind up about it. Honestly, if it's something you'd need to keep to yourself, that might say something about the relationship, but that's yours to ponder and there are certainly people who go through and happy relationships with that quietly tucked away. Being able to open up about even your most closely kept intimate thoughts and secrets is beautiful in a relationship, though. There's a lot of trust to that, but being able to do so pays dividends and as you establish a two-way intimate trust, it's a good indicator you might just be with a really good partner for you. So, a questoin would be how well do you trust her? My wife and I are both bi and shared that knowledge with each other early on. It did NOT open up any doors for rampant threesomes and moresomes. It DID draw us closer together as one example of the intimate trust we established. On occassion we do have those funny little things. A commercial come on TV and I'll a woman that I know would be attractive to my wife, notice her watching and give her a little wink and a smirk. She'll burst out in laughter and exclaim, "You knew what I was thinking, didn't you?!! You know me too well." Neither of us is a jealous person, though, so those kinds of things don't bother us. free chat
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