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looking for a best friend and eventually more I would like to answer your rock bottom question. She says she has hit rock bottom. I’m not sure I believe it. She still seems very dependent on me. She has yet to find employment. Until I her surviving on her own, I not believe her. She says she quit drinking in one sentence, but I hear her talk about “drinks”. Her messages sound drunk. To sum it up, she is probably skipping off the bottom at this point. How far she go up? Only time tell. I do not think that 2 days of communication is detrimental to the severance. Of course she weaseled her way in by asking for help with some legal matters she has to deal with. The “communication” started because I got upset with her that she s me out of the blue and doesn’t ask “is this a good time”. She expects me to jump. I told her that I had to euthanize the dog. I told her work is slow. The bills pile up. Life is different; you can’t “temporarily” live here because someone does now. My decision to change everything is checks and balance system. The wife cannot come back, period. Personally I’d rather not be the “friends with the ex type.” Those people always seem odd to me. Well almost all of them. I know very few that “friends” works or doesn’t seem odd. I have turned her down on meeting. I informed her to not just show up. I told her that I do not need a rollercoaster of emotions. The mistake I made was telling her I was lonely. Oops! Your side note/observation is good one. I really appreciate some people on here. Then I find that some, maybe unintentionally, transpose their bitter situation onto the OP and really don’t follow what anyone is saying. That would be similar to a therapist becoming a therapist because they are so messed up and trying to figure out their own head. Working with others not to help them, but to help themselves. Believe it or not, I am strong. I won’t be down by these people, but yes, I get really irritated by this type. You are right, it is more prevalent now. It is more so now than before because I’m sick of it. I have an in my head for intimacy. My question is, how do I turn it off? It’s really not as deep as some think. I know I am wounded. I know I don’t need to get intimate with these women. How do you turn off the subconscious urge to reach out? black nude girls of Bellevue
looking for sexting girl friend divorce doesn't mean your ex isn't entitled to his. He can still be a "dad" during his visit times. Second, why on earth would you bring up a crumb of affection (like getting you a lousy coffee) when you put up with and neglect for the rest of the time? Are those little things irreplaceable? No, they're not, and they really pale in comparison to what is supposed to be like. If he refuses counseling, tell him that you refuse to go on with this roller coaster ride of a relationshit. Tell him if he can't or won't change to work together, you're getting off. Be forewarned: he can request support and spousal support if you've been the primary breadwinner. Get your ducks in a row about what you're legally entitled to (without telling him about it) by contacting a few lawyers to which one you feel comfortable with. They usually offer free over the phone consultation. educated looking for the same
What if a couple followed your plan exactly? He works, she's a SAHM, they have a traditional, 50's marriage. They struggle to make it on one salary, but they live in a fixer-upper home that sucks up a lot of upkeep money. Second hand car, shared between them, making do. She works in the garden, cans and freezes fresh produce, shops the bargains, does all the thrifty tricks to make ends meet. Fruit trees, grape vines, fruit bearing bushes. They're broke, but happy. Then one day her DH drops dead of a heart attack. She has to take out a (or uses his meager insurance policy) for his burial expenses, and now she's flat broke. She can sell the house, try to find work (good luck, with younger women with degrees competing for minimum wage jobs). But she has no cash left, and hungry mouths to feed. Would you snip at her for having she couldn't afford? Circumstances change. People have to adapt. In her case, she either takes some public assistance and trains for a full-time career, or they're homeless and starving. Sad thing is, most folks would piss and moan anyway because this irresponsible, middle aged woman, is sucking the life out of welfare while they bust their asses at work. I say, enjoy that righteous indignation while you can. Before, your own job might be outsourced and you could find yourself in the same boat. Uh-oh, that boat's leaking, so you'd better bail fast, or learn how to tread water. Warwick Rhode Island married women wanting sex
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