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I don't think we can live without systems, just because of the way human social nature and cognition works. To me, the question is how flexible are the systems? How much room for maneuverability do they have in them? How do they deal with change? Are they responsive to people's needs? I also think it is good to push people out of their comfort zones (or, at the very least, certainly up to the edge of them so they're dancing right on that thin line), so I think your initial impulse was a good one. I just think that it is a delicate operation, which is why it needs a more personal touch than a "program" can usually give. I do think there are little things that could be done (although generally speaking not legislated or forced). Have you ever noticed how alike everything in the states is? Like even down to hotel rooms? You go in a hotel and all the floors are exactly the same, and all the rooms. And if you go to a hotel in another city, it's indistinguishable from one somewhere. Why? Why do we need everything to be the same? Why don't business owners take gentle risks and make their places look different or creative, acclimate people in a completely safe way to the fact that not everything is the same? Why do cities have laws that all houses have to be painted a certain, narrow range of colors? Why do people shop at chain places they recognize, even when traveling, instead of supporting independent stores? Because they know it? That discourages anything different in favor of what we're comfortable with. And since people travel a lot and the market encourages nationwide megachains, it encourages homogeneity not just within cities, but across them. But there's no "natural" reason it has to be that way, and it certainly isn't in countries. Searcy fat womens sexThen why do you need advice? You might find his behavior disrespectful but he doesn't seem to care. He isn't changing his behavior to alleviate your concerns. Have you asked him or yourself why? If anything you seem less of a priority compared to the secret messages he's keeping. No, the messages aren't your business but your ability to trust him and feel safe within the confines of your relationship is. girls wants for sex
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