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Look He was unfaithful in nonperformance for YEARS. Somehow he get away with that somehow no one that as an issue. You were only a little foolish in telling him but fair enough at least it got him to go for the Viagra. Of COURSE you would prefer to have sex with your husband. No surprise there. Most of us would. Oddly guys get away with nonperformance suggest you just do what ya gotta do but keep it safe and discreet. If you can, it help your sanity more so to rework the agreement formally between you reality is that he has no intentions of fulfilling his part of the marital contract to have sex or maybe ability that could easily be too. He actually be relieved. Do whatever you do with compassion you know he's not evil or terrible but with the term porn thing, it would take a whole lot to turn the mind patterns and physical reaction patterns to turn around. does have sex therapists you can try. Guys don't tend to go for it but hey maybe. If it takes a lover, just do it and heaven forbid you actually say anything anywhere 'coz gotta tell ya you're not going to get a lot of support. Just be discreet, safe and kind. Women have been making this bargain for thousands of years as have men. 70% of marriages have had at least one affair do the math. It isn't all men and it isn't all women and there are lots and lots of reasons. Marriages have been subsidized by lots of things forever, family, community property, career, sports, fame, lots of things. If that does go against your grain, get yourself over to Good Vibrations or Romantasy and pick up something truly choice. If you're going to survive, as well do it with some pleasure somewhere. Even if it is within 2 square inches. No you should not have to be celibate for the next 30 years. Funny how no one would tolerate a spouse witholding food, money, shelter, healthcare .but somehow sex is this one off exception where abandonment is supposed to be ok. Ah well. Good luck. Keytesville Missouri guy for middle aged woman
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