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I have sole custody of my grandson, I am the paternal grandparent. My was 16 at his birth, the womb donor was 15 both unstable, neither would work yada yada The married (against my -) and of course divorced..were eventually kicked out of my house. was months early, and lived in ICU for months. Was like pulling teeth trying to get parents to even visit ..I gained legal custody after the placed in hostile environment he was 6 months then now he is 5 years still neither parent has stepped up to the plate. Mother is now living with a registered sex offender, and clueless why I wouldn't let the visit anylonger. story short I ended up filing stalking charges on mother after termination of parental rights she continues to post the childs pictures on face book and cries about her "-" and how I have tortured her all these years. (I begged her to or visit, but the sex offender was not welcome) stalking charges stood up in court, however she continues to blast me on her pages family members inform me of these incidents. Do I go ahead and file contempt charges on her or just continue to ignore her childish behaviors? The kid doesn't even know who she is at this point, but, geeze get a life. bi party tonightYou mention an 18 year old, I'm assuming there are also younger involved. My ex had two and I went through all of it dealing with their mother. Eventually I had to step back from the details of their interaction. They are the mother and father of these, they have to make their own decisions. You've taken on a lot of baggage and it won't end until the last one is grown up and support is over even then she still be in their lives. Adults things are between adults. You the and show them that, but if it comes down to issues between mom and dad, you just need to tell them you them but their mom and dad have to work things like that out. Otherwise your life be consumed with their drama and trust me, your marriage won't survive. I did a lot of fighting on behalf of my stepchildren to provide them with the first stable home life they had in years and to show them what a normal life was like. You can do all of this without getting involved in things like support and a backpack. And as far as "paying for meals", ask the 18 year old how he would like to deal with it. Maybe he wants to show up with a grocery bag of food for the weekend. Maybe the easy way out is to give him $20 to run to McDs for every meal. Ask him what he thinks it would take for this to not be a problem for him. Ironiy after my ex and I split, the mother decided to take my advice and go into counseling. No for dad, he chose his path and it didn't include his. Continuing to fight with her was more important than what was best for the. But she did come out of it with a healthier way of dealing with the, their disappointments and their relationship with their father. I would say that if any of this influences their attitude or school, family counseling on your side is in order. Bottom line, you are on the sidelines of this and the two of them have to choose how they are going to deal with the and each other. It isn't your fight. If you can your husband and your stepchildren and put the rest of that stuff out of your mind, support them without taking sides, and just them it be enough. Or as in my case, it not be. cheating married men
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