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I’ve posted before but I’m new to this and now I am on vaca with nothing to do but out with old friends and read more of this wonderful forum. I was wondering if some posters had thoughts on this subject. Let me try to preface this with – I try not to give advice to my friends (good rule about staying friends) but to only offer support, so this question is just posed as a hypothetical that if there was something wonderful that I could say to my friend to make her feel better about this, what would it be? I have a wonderful friend that met a woman years ago that ed herself a bi-sexual. This was slightly unsettling for her but she fell in with this woman. Now ten years into their relationship she still identifies as a bi-sexual which makes my friend feel like her partner isn’t convinced that she be with her forever or she would simply identify as lesbian. She has talked to her partner (another wonderful woman) about this and she gets that sexual identity is separate from having sex but she just can’t get over it. She is thinking about breaking up with her because she’s at an age where she needs the comfort and security of a term commitment and she fears that her partner really isn’t feeling the same way about her. Imo her fears are unfounded. What kind and considerate thing could someone say about this? I used to suggest that she said it for shock value because it did sort of shock me when she would say it (I would have to laugh with her girlfriend about her need to tell every lesbian that she was actually bi-sexual and not just an ordinary lesbian like the rest of us after she had tipped maybe a few too back) but it’s been so years now that just doesn’t seem to be possible anymore. Any good books on the subject? I'm sorry that was sooo (brevity isn't my strong suit)I can’t stay to respond back immediately but thanks for reading and thanks for any ideas you have. married woman Lezo
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