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Sorry for that tasteless, bad joke when I was asking for serious advice on something super important to me. In all seriousness, thank you for sharing your experience and your insightful comments. Sometimes being able to solicit advice freely (ie, w/out souring my family and friends' opinions of my husband), really help. I think definitely finding a therapist/possibly marriage counseling, too help and it's nice to have it thrown in my face (by looking at my posts and examples) to make me I so obviously need it. That's the thing: we're two normal, regular people who, while we clearly have things to work on, are happy in our normal day-to-day life and in. We're not partiers (ha, he doesn't even finish a glass of wine when we go out and I'm not into empty calories so rarely drink!) and are responsible people, our families and are good to our friends. Thank you!! nasty Iowa City Iowa girls
Traveling makes things a lot more difficult. Especially depending on how you stay somewhere and just where you are. Seems like there should be a Guide to Kinky Travel out there somewhere. I'm sure there is, but I've never looked for one. Searching for others shouldn't be too different. Excluding language bariers your best bet is still most likely online forums and groups. Knowing local laws is more important abroad than in the states if some of the documentaries I've seen have truth to them. While my state has a "no sodomy" law, people don't get sent to jail for anal sex. In some countries you can be. Make sure if you do involve others in a scene all limits are known and set beforehand. Same as they should be state-side. Just re-read you're living abroad, not just traveling. Same advice applies though if you're settled in one placeonce you find a group it makes more intimate relations less complicated sinceyou can take the time to get to know and be comfortable with people. looking for sex YumaJust as "versatile" usually means "bottom" and "height and weight proportionate" means "doesn't go to the gym" W4W ads also have their own language. "Curious" usually means "horny" and "bisexual" usually means "I'm married to a or I have a boyfriend". Because the vast majority of single people want to date other single people not women who are hooked up with a guy people skip right by ads that contain these code words. I'm bisexual and I'm proud to be bisexual. I've been interviewed in magazine articles where I specifiy asked that I be ed bisexual but when it comes to personal ads I think it is just much better to use the catch-all term "queer" instead. "Queer" means you know you are interested in women, you are presumably single and you probably introduce a potential girlfriend to all your friends. That's really all most people want and after you go out on a few dates you can discuss specific labels. If you are more comfortable identifying as "bi" or "bisexual" I would advise putting "single" in your ad too to clarify things. I know it seems redundant but a lot of people who skip past ads from bi people are going to be more open to it if they know you don't have some boyfriend lurking in the wings. I wouldn't discuss past sexual experience until the point in dating when most people have "the conversation" about safer sex and sexual history and whatnot. Most people discuss that stuff several dates and a week or two in when people know each other better and the relationship might become sexual. If you bring this up as a big topic right away it might add a lot of pressure and expectations to the already high pressure situation of personal ad dating. horny chat
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