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good man who will love me just as i am DH needs a reality check. Either you're on the same with co-parenting, or this thing isn't gonna work out over the haul. No, his aren't little demons, but they're not little angels, either. Good parents step up to the plate and take their to task when they misbehave. It's time to level the playing field. You're their stepmother, not their BBsitter. They're welcome in your home, but like all homes, there are rules. You have every right to set them and enforce them. Keep in mind that when boys get into late adolescence, it's not unusual for them to crave more time with their Dads. With the family dynamics in your household, that urge only become stronger. I can promise you that if he packs up his things and leaves, just to get away from all the BS, you never look at DH the same again. Tell him that. When you negotiate this thing, make sure he realizes that if you not allow your to feel squeezed out. He is a member of the household. DH needs to respect that, and *model* that respect to his. Tell that of yours that if he doesn't take this matter seriously, your resentment build to the point that the marriage fail. And you don't intend to around and watch it play out.
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