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question to go along with this (or advice) is what do you do for yourself or how do you build up self-esteem? all i've thought on this the several different times and days i've beaten up myself over practiy nothing, but almost a waste of life. i should've been working on the good in me, instead of trying to figure out how i can be better for him. i believe he cares about me, but it's his own way and it's not normal. i'm not trying to push blame, but i got over a cheating spouse 15ish years ago and went on with life and chose to him (my husband), don't feel as if i've compared him to my ex or dare make him feel guilty b/c he did a similar action of my ex. as far as my texting, it was either goofy jokes, everyday talk or at the worst, hey you remember the other day when blah blah blah or whatever happened? what was it that i did to catch your attention? no, i'm not trying to smooth it over as to what i did, b/c the asking and curiousity (sp) was rediculous. it could've led to more, but i do know how to control myself and not let heat of the moment take action. yes, i know i'm decent looking, i just wanted to know what i did to get the attention, maybe if i used those actions on my husband would it get his attention? anyways, i appreciate all input, negative or positive. just trying to find inner self help. over 40 swingers Thompson Pennsylvania PA
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