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Set aside the cheap rental situation for a moment. If there wasn't an offer on the table, would you even consider tying yourself up in a situation where she's your landlord? Where she can walk in anytime, dictate/change terms, degrade and insult you possibly right in front of your? It sounds like boundaries are messed up already. I think your primary focus should be on what's best for the, and getting your life together to be the best mother you can be. The only way I would consider taking your mother up on her offer is if you two can sit down and calmly discuss boundaries and terms. If her offer comes with strings attached, they might just choke you. Or, if her motives are pure and she really has your best interests at heart, it be workable. Do her accusations have any merit? I'm not judging you, just asking. If she has valid concerns, she need to work on her delivery. In situations like this, there's usually two sides, and a truth that lies somewhere in between. Maybe? naughty South San Francisco swinger s partyYou give permission for what you allow. You have allowed him to be lazy about this relationship, and frankly, you sound more like his mother than his girlfriend. He knows you're not going anywhere, because you are soooooo in luuuuvvvvv. So far, you've treated him the way you want to be treated. So think of it this way: He has shown you the way HE wants to be treated. So give him what he wants. Stop with the 5 AM breakfast shit. Leave a box of Cheerios on the table if you're feeling generous. He starts to do his own laundry. Stop and grab your own dinner before you get home, and walk in already fed he's on his own for dinner. YOU ARE REWARDING HIM FOR TREATING YOUR POORLY. After all that, you STILL leave him and a sweet note?!? Talk about mixed messages!!!!!!! Stop pleading. Stop crying. Stop begging. Find some dignity and grow a spine. "Never grow a wishbone where your backbone ought to be." And stop rewarding poor behavior! He does not FEEL what you are feeling. So make it easier for him to feel it. (This is a reason why I'm not a big fan of living together before marriage. Right now you have all the responsibilities of marriage, and absolutely none of the perks. How is this a win-win for you?) The other option is to simply walk, but you aren't going to do that. So your basic problem is this: You aren't going to change him unless he decides it's in his best interests to change. So either you put up and shut up, or you make it clear what the expectations are and follow through with consequences if they don't materialize. You're about 2 years and 51 weeks too late, but some CAN be taught. You are too to be this -'s maid and dog. female women
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