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I am in a relationship that I take very seriously, and he feels the same. My boyfriend provides a nicer lifestyle than I would for myself. We work at home together, and I have two pt jobs, and take a couple classes. In addition to all of this there seems to be a nonverbal agreement that I keep up the on the chores at the same time. I am having a hard time accepting this and not feeling low, even though he also buys me nice things when I ask and surprises me with gifts. Sometimes I feel obligated and don't like it, and other times I feel like he expects a woman to do these things. Our life is not lavish, but we do live comfortably to our standards. I want to get married and hopefully to him. Should I be trying harder to except that he is organizationally challenged and stop trying to get him to keep our house up to my clean standards even though they are not unreasonable. My Aunt says he's a keeper but needs training? He is from the country, and has a less well-rounded upbringing than myself and has not been in classy atmospheres. I don't want him to feel uncomfortable or like his background isn't up to my standards, but I do wish he cared more about some things that he doesn't. I suppose what I'm really looking for is some advice on how to maintain a clean home against all odds without feeling like a doormat because it make me happier in the grand scheme of things. But, is doing this going to make him respect me less? Is this co-dependency or co-existence? Maybe we're just balancing each other's strengths and weaknesses? assistant director of photography for dfest
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