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I wanted to thank some of you who offered constructive advice last Friday about the situation with my father in law and his restaurant, my continued funding of said restaurant and the tension in my marriage because of it. I shared the thread with my wife and we discussed it at length over the weekend and this is the end result. -Her father is 72 years old. It's time for him to retire. He still has significant retirement funds in Korea and a retirement package from Korean Air. He would be able to pick up life there with little difficulty. -It would be financially more effective for us to settle the on the restaurant, forgive the money we loaned him and buy her parents a new apartment in Seoul then it would to continue to pump money into a venture that is very unsure in an economy that is weak and not likely to improve significantly in the near future. -We can wind down the restaurant after he has already settled in Korea, allowing him to save face, after all, retirement is acceptable even if failure isn't. There is some value in the appliances purchased for it etc and we would likely recoup some small amount of our total investment. -Her parents moved here after her brother died in a car accident to be closer to my wife. Her mom is ready to move back home and told us her father has expressed a to return to Korea as well. We make plans to visit them in Seoul every for the foreseeable future. -My wife and her mother broached this subject with her father last night and he was receptive. It's not a perfect solution and it still leaves us on the hook for a significant amount of money. But it does allow her father to walk away with his "honor" intact and it gives us light at the end of the tunnel, so to speak, that we be able to move forward as a family and much happier then we are now. Anyway, thank you all for the help. Some of it was very insightful, and a dispassionate look is always productive. seeks passionate but neglected fI you come back to read this as you do have options. COBRA won't help you as you don't qualify. You can certainly add to the divorce stipulation that he continue to add you to his insurance policy for the remainder of your life. You have pre-existing conditions which make it difficult if not impossible to find new insurance. Your attorney can easily get this stipulated. Regarding his proclivities with other women, that's an emotional burden and I am sorry you've just found out. It's a shock to find out the plan you signed up for has been revised without your knowledge or consent. The internet has provided increased opportunity for sex in facets (visual, emotional, physical) and that just happens to be a fact now. Where Penthouse and Playboy once were found in basements or under beds, now more is available and with a computer, the information can be viewed and retrieved by others. He very well be a sex addict, or he could be an opportunist that's found great delight on what's presently available. I'd have to agree that the 34-year-old is seeking money from him. She might enjoy his company but what do they actually have in common? It's not appropriate to write her name or information online. It was done in anger and that's wrong. It is appropriate to file for divorce (if you are so inclined), have a forensic accountant involved with an attorney specializing in term marriages. The accountant review all the monies spent and determine the finances accordingly. Texas is interesting as there is a community property and separate property division. If he's put the car in his name solely, you can't claim it. If the house is in both names, is yours. There could be a health issue related to his sexual proclivities. You might want to take that route first as a physician or psychiatrist might resolve the problem without filing for divorce. If not possible or you're absolutely too angry to even think of that, spend some time with consultations of attorneys. You two have $, you both brought it in (his work and your catering). This means you both have -'s and other assets to consider. Your and grandchildren be effected by whatever happens so go about it carefully, whatever you do. Good luck. -/Paralegal singles looking for sex
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