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Hi everyone, I am posting in this forum to go. I have a problem and i just have no one to talk to. I am depressed and i have talked to my husband and family and friens and my doctor. i've been getting treatment (40mgPaxil) for a few months and i think it has helped. at least now i can get out of bed and shower. when my depression was bad i quit my job. i made up a bogus excuse and ended up being able to go on EI (canadian unemplyment insurance) but now it is running out. My EI claim was fraudulent i guess, because you have to swear to be willing and capable of working . and i'm not. I suffer from IBS and panic attacks and i have gotten really good at playing like i am happy. I don't know what to do. I don't want to leavve the house, nevermind go and find a job. i burned my brides with my longtime employer because i was desperate to just go home and sleep foever. unfortunatly i can't sleep forever unless im dead and i can't be dead because my parents and husband me. i don't know what to do. i don't know how we are going to pay our bills without my income. the government would charge me with fraud for sure if they knew that i was really home becuase of being unwell, and that i have barely been looking at jobs. i almost wish i was deeply depressed like i was a few months ago so i wouldn't be stressed out. just numb instead. now i cry. then i slept. i wish i could sleep forever. but i my family and my husband needs me to be strong and happy for him. and he need me to bring in money or we'll get evicted. I don't know what kind of help i'm looking for but i feel like i need to be rescued. I feel like i would rather lose everything than have to face getting a job and going back out into the world. something Cedar Rapids and discreet while wifes at work
I work a 9-to-5 with a salary around $50k a year. He is a music producer who works from home when he's not touring the world (mostly and Canada, but also Europe) and brings in less than half of what I do at this point. He picks up odd jobs here and there (., lighting and sound for a company) to supplement his income. We split all our shared expenses in half (rent, utilities, a credit card we share). I cover my personal bills (., student -) while he covers his car payment and insurance. I'll split the car expenses with him when I get my license and begin driving. When we go on vacation together, we split those costs as well. We have individual bank accounts, and a shared account. We currently use the shared account for vacations, and that's what we'll use to cover expenses for our in the future. We have no shame about income disparity because we both contribute competently and fairly to our shared and individual expenses. We live within our means for the most part, though there is some debt between us which he is paying off in small monthly installments. We don't consider that shameful, just a challenge. sweet curvy girl seeking a kind loving gentlemanAnd yes, so important to remember the Rule, "past behavior is the best predictor of future behavior". Also, to never make anyone your priority if you aren't his. That's the other point. Everything matters a lot more than I do. He doesn't even know that I was just diagnosed with a chronic health issue (MS), and that I am about to lose my job due to downsizing. I told him about both issues but he doesn't LISTEN, he only waits for the first to jump in and make every damn conversation about him and his needs. Thanks so much for your advice, compassion and hugs, Fallout. They were well spent, well received, and much appreciated. Here is what I'll do today: Research my legal options in regard to my marriage. Research info on my health situation. Re-evaluate my job situation, and how I ensure a stream of income if I lose my job. Have a great weekend! swinger party
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