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Hilarious! Longer than I'd have thought! My question is, why the hell would anybody hire that dude as a motivational speaker? What exactly is motivating about 6 minutes of silliness? I mean, was he speaking at Clown College? Jebus. hot horny girls of 17701So today I didn't take my dog to the dog park like I promised, so we went for a run this evening instead. I come home to my apartment, and notice none of the lights are on. I always leave the light over the stove on. Always. But I check around and nothing is amiss and my dog is acting quite normally, so I go ahead and put him in his crate with some food, and hop in the shower. The water is perfectly warm, my shampoo rinsing from my hair smells amazing, like orange creamsicles. My shower curtain is yanked forcefully open, and a scream escapes my mouth before I even what I should be afraid of. So somebody in one of those really glittery mardi gras masks and all black clothing literally LIFTS me out of the tub and tosses me to the floor of my bedroom. I live alone, and was screaming like a motherfucker. It's only when I my dog's crate at the foot of my bed, as my face is pushed to the floor, is empty, that I start to really really panic. My arms were yanked behind my back, despite my struggling I landed a few solid kicks and something cold and hard was placed around each of them handcuffs, I reasoned at the clink of metal snapping into place. All I can is my dog's empty crate and I feel smooth latex in the shape of a gloved hand run down my sides, snake around my front to pinch my nipples mercilessly, which I hate, before pulling away. A gruff voice mumbles, "You're still soapy." My body is being supported by only my face and knees, and I'm cold and I AM still soapy, I can feel it as his hands course familiarly over my skin. And then I feel my knees being kicked apart "Why?!" I cry, fearing everything from AIDs to babies to murder. My only answer is the sound of a zipper. And then this little tearing sound, kind of like paper. And then something with a jagged edge, small and square and metalish, is placed on the small of my back. I hold my breath, tears streaming down my face, snot mingling with it, and none of it flowing in the right direction since my face is somewhat upside down. dating american singles
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