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what matters is that this doesn't seem to be working for you. You met when you both were essentially and immediately took on adult roles and responsibilities. In reality, you are still growing and discovering who you are. Life is not always logical. Emotions, morality and truth also play into how we live our lives. If something doesn't feel right, don't do it! don't try to convince yourself and agonize over rationalizing it. Be accepting of your emotions and reactions to this. There is NO NEED TO CHANGE who you are for the sake of someone. Also, understand who your spouse is you are selling yourself out in an attempt to accomodate him. Ask yourself, why? unhappy and lonely girlBackground: I caught my wife having an affair in -'08. It had been going on for a couple of years. story short, with no, it would have been easy to dovorce. But we have faced our issues together and have made tremendous progress. I have monitored my wife on occasion by using recording devices, monitoring phone records etc and relatively sure she has initiated no contact. The problem is the Other keeps trying to sneak in under the radar and reel her back in. I've spoken with the twice by phone after an early and late November attempt to contact my wife. Both times laid the law down but apparently to no avail. Last week I stuck a recording device in her car I record him as he tells my wife he dreams everyday of XXXXXXX her and basiy says he do so again. By the tone of the conversation, I'm sure it was a meeting. But he had already scheduled an appointment at her place of work under another name to her the next day. I observe him visit my wife at her work. My wife she put herself in that situation. She claims it was all innocent, but she is an adult with the power to say no. I decided gave her the walking papers on Friday. After a bout we have agreed to one more attempt to rebuild. I mean Fucking everything is back to square #1. I made her her brother and sister to confess. She needs a bit of shame in her life, not burying a dirty secret. I don't think there has been any infidelity since, but I'm sick of this. Everytime he enters our lives, it wrecks all the trust and progress we have made. The OM I decided to contact a private detective and obtain all contact info on his wife and family. It was a promise I made to him that each time he contacts my wife I contact his wife. Other than his name and a business phone number, I have purposely avoided knowing what this looks like, what he drives, where he lives. He's an arrogant POS and I dream everyday of doing violent things to this. I need advice. Rat him out to his wife and risk blowback from her/him? Sit on the info and he got the message? top dating
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