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I myself am divorced, not by my own choice, but because after 20 something years my ex decided he "just wasn't happy." This has nothing to do with me not being a good wife mother As a working mom, I CHOSE to teach so I could have the same schedule as my and have a flexible schedule as far as taking care of illness what not. I was at every school and extra-curricular event and activity, took on the role of leader and organizer where needed, and did ALL of the things I would have done if I were a SAHM. He and I shared household responsibilities to an extent, but dinner on the table, laundry, and the bulk of the "women's work" were on me. Most divorces I've seen of the 20+ year marriages (and there are far more than you'd think) come when one partner (more often than not the male partner) decides somewhere in middle age that he's missing out on something goes looking for the "greener grass." This idealized notion that once upon a time all women stayed home and took care of their is a media-propagated bunch of crap. That Leave it to Beaver fantasy didn't exist outside of the very wealthy until the s (post WW2 when, thanks to the GI VA loans, the middle class was created). It is an ignorant woman who chooses not to make sure she had adequate education and training to support herself, and her family if need be. My grandmother, born in , worked until she married, but when my grandfather died and she was left with the responsibility of raising her two sons, the youngest a 10 y/o, she rejoined the workforce. She didn't remarry until after both her sons were through college, and worked until retirement age. She was also up, fully dressed, hair makeup perfect, and breakfast on the table every single day of her life. I have two, one of each gender, and I fully expect both of them to complete their post-secondary education and find rewarding careers. When if they, I that the enter into a partnership, not a dependent relationship. If either of them choose to stay home to raise their until school age, they have my full support. Staying home to be the "perfect wife" to a demanding needy husband is, well, a sci-fi movie .ever hear of Stepford? sexy girls ClaymontI've already said several times that BBUK clearly didn't intend malice. To me, this conversation is about unintended interpretations. You are trying to convince me that because a word is in the dictionary one way, that that is it's only taken interpretation? You and I both know full well that is not the case. People are extremely creative with the way they use language, especially with nuance and. I can't help but think that this is especially personal for you because of your own family connection to cotton, since you've taken the pains to point that out several times and also that your family is not black. Okay. I can this. But that also does not mean that the phrase is used by people to still mean n____. My own family is Greek, but that didn't stop the Klan from burning a cross on their lawn and considering them "niggers" a couple of generations ago. Historiy, skin color is not the only thing that counts as race in this country. It also includes things like country of origin, religion (Catholics got the short end of it for a time here), class, and occupation. I fall midway between your position and ulula's. I do believe words all words have a time and place in which they can be used. Political or academic discussions, fiction, etc. all seem to me perfectly legit places to use powerful words of this sort. But I think we should consider carefully whether we want to throw them around blasely in everyday speech, not even realizing their meaning. Little say things are "-" or "niggerknock" on people's doors and run away without knowing what those words mean, often without intending any malice at all. That doesn't make them less painful to overhear. But one can that when they discover their meanings they have the decency to either stop using them or use them only in thoughtful contexts. hot women having sex
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