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PMS time again, which means a search for WWIII and a reason to blame me.. Only this time it escalated to the point where I'm getting s and messages that she's going to do violence to our 21 month old daughter, wishes she would have had an abortion, I find she's been driving around without the car seat attached, totally recklessly endangering our daughter.. And basiy, if she can only manage to cause a real disaster, then maybe I'll actually be punished (for what? I was hoping she could take care of the for a morning so I could go to a workshop ) won't nap with mom, falls asleep in 5 minutes with me on the way home from daycare, mom drives her crazy with endless noisy fussing, cannot make a sound without mom loudly yammering back at her, so the result is that when is with mom the soundtrack is fussing, crying, tantrums but with me it's quiet, laughing, and singsong I'm a wreck, don't want to the cops or protective services on wife of course, but after this round I no longer trust her to be alone with at all Of course, as as mom gets back in her body and the pain body goes away, it's all and lollipops, lovey dovey to the, happy wallowing around in her pig-sty mess (which I as another way she exercises control over me and the situation, I spend virtually all my time with family picking up after her, the excuse is that when we make more money she can hire a maid ) So . I really and have a great relationship with my toddler, and am stuck in a sitch where it's not going to be easy to split We run a business together, have the, live together, etc When wife is not flipped out she's nice, great creative partner, etc, but she needs to know that I can't take the much longer Our NVC coach had us take a big step back when we admitted that we had actually been violent a few times, not like punching, but she has pushed so hard and so on me that I've lost my temper, and she's thrown herself at me and it turns into a wrestling match, me holding her down until the adreniline rush passes days like this thats exactly what she is asking for, end result is me feeling like shit for days, and her saying, "well, at least you are being authentic.." bullshit woman with red dress a furtherthe value of the property would be an OK idea. Knowing and understanding your options is always smart. But shut the fuck up about it. Seriously, do not go around telling friends or others and most certainly don't tell her. That goes for every strategy you look at during the negotiations. Keep fucking quiet. I cannot tell you how times I hear people say what they can do in a divorce well my attorney says XXX or friend or worse, difo and idiots like me. They tell this to the very person who they are locked in a legal suit with WTF. No gather ALL the information you can, understand what the hell you're doing and what your actions can lead to. You're living separately and by looking at this you're still paying on the marital home. Alright, now if there has been an increase in the value then until you file I suggest you maintain the status quo but get something filed ASAP and stop the bleeding. In all likelihood this isn't going to be any sort of windfall and might not even be worth pursuing. But that doesn't mean it can't be of use, it can be worth a lot. It could allow you to make a clean break, it could help pave the way to a 'civil' divorce. If you learn and know your rights you be able to negotiate from a position of knowledge and power. That can allow you to be fair and make calm rational decisions in a time all you want to do is body slam her. Even under agreeable circumstances there are times where there's an opportunity to fuck it all up. A way to make it clear to her I am being reasonable and if you fuck with me HERE is what I could do. Honestly, it's her home, she bought it. You don't want the fucker do you? Let her keep it and use the equity as leverage for other things if it's available and if not, only calmly use the fact you contributed to if you can get clear title on the car or coffee table, even peace of mind and walking away from it knowing you didn't cause an unecessary shitstorm whatever. But go find out and for fuck sake, its your life and don't take what a dipshit like me's word for it. naughty woman
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