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The problem, as mentioned, is that when all the posts are identical because only one type of discussion is encouraged, I've just skipped every post on the forum. As to your Polyanna spin on the world, again, I must disagree. You say that those who talking endlessly about ourselves as bragging feel badly about their own lives? I don't find that the case. From what I can tell, the women on here who keep a low profile in terms of talking about their own accomplishments are the ones who have the strongest sense of self and who consistently have the most achievements under their belts. They simply don't need to curry feedback from others about that, because that motivation comes from within, not from outside. I also don't think it is false humility. From what I can tell, those women have achievements under their belts precisely because their standards are very high (they are their own greatest critics, in other words), and so any sense of humility is not false, it is very real. They can be simultaneously proud of what they've done while secretly thinking they probably could have done better. So why crow about something that was good but not GREAT? On the other hand, those who only feel good if they have others sticking their noses halfway up their asses seem to me of highly questionable self-esteem. Encouraging that kind of behavior is not positive. Additionally, you seem to think that bragging about shit gives positive motivation because you are talking about something good. I again must disagree, at least in part. Talking about good things does boost people, but talking about YOURSELF does NOT, because it gives other people nothing to latch onto or add of their own. It is a monologue, not a discussion. It is not generous. It is selfish. What if someone doesn't give a shit about gyms? If that's the ONLY good thing you can ever talk about, you have done NOTHING for that other person except bored them to tears. To repeat this is why multiple forms of discourse are necessary. Because not everyone wants to have some creepy ass sycophantic, robotic interaction to feel good about themselves. For some of us, it is HIGHLY NEGATIVE AND UNCOMFORTABLE BECAUSE IT SMACKS OF THE GROSSEST HETERONORMATIVITY. As queers, can we really I mean REALLY not the problem with demanding everyone act the same. Really? Holy. Fuck. people that wanna fuck near Luzern
I guess I was too concerned about writing a novel for my first post (which obviously failed) than pointing out more of the significance of that particular event. Prior to then, our D/s relationship only existed in the context of our bedroom. In fact she was the first person that I had a meaningful D/s relationship of any kind, so I was hesitant about even mentioning extending it to outside of our bedroom as potentially part of our daily life. As to the incident in which I lost control, I just automatiy slipped in to my Dom persona over something that was not in our past boundaries for our D/s relationship. It was wrong, and I stopped and started to apologize for going outside of the boundaries we had operated in without discussing it first, but was interrupted by her to continue. We had a talk afterwards where she revealed to me that she had noticed that when she unintentionally pushed my quirks (. left an empty carton of. in the fridge), even though I'd chalked it up to living with someone and no big deal, I'd be much more dominant and when we role-played (which she liked). I never made a conscious connection between the two, but she started intentionally pushing my buttons (again, over things that I would just attribute to two people living together) to if that directly correlated to a more D/s session. After our chat, whenever I'd come across an empty carton of. (for example), I'd simply ask why she didn't text me when I was at the store. it ended up in her asking to be punished. I never said I was a good Dom and I've got a lot to learn (obviously only having one gf into a D/s relationship), but I'm certainly not looking for excuses to punish someone. I guess I just wanted to introduce myself and my experiences and get a little advice. I mean what do you do when you live in a conservative area with kinky sexual preferences and non-conservative political and religious beliefs? I mean there are plenty of kinksters in the area but I want more than just sex; I want someone I can form an actual connection with. Is there an kinky-atheist group in West MI out there? looking for budddiesall lines of communication have been shutdown. Is it time to walk away or is there another option. An example of this lack of communication is as follows. A) Hey just got back from the gym, I know you work earlier tomorrow so do you want to go out for dinner or eat at home. B) I don't care A) well if we go out for dinner it be around 10 pm when we get back home, its pm right now sooo I still need to shower and dress. Up to you though. B) we can stay home idc a) ok well then I jump in the shower and when I get out I start cooking B) ok, (then later, mopping around and silence) A) Whats wrong? B) I wanted to go out A) . This is just one example that can be applied to just about every communication that has happened in the last year. I of course have a strong personallity and at times am guilty of asserting my opinion or my decisions. But I listen if I am told that this is something someone really wants to do and I am leaving it up to them. Funny thing is, this same person complains about my lack of decisions . at a total loss. Attempting to address one issue from the bottom up and getting no where. free adult dating sites
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