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Couples counseling can't fix this mess. It's not him, it's not you: it's BOTH of you. You have interlocking pathologies. Your boyfriend is not manly. He's psychologiy primitive. No amount of counseling can change the fact that he's not developmentally ready to be in a relationship. He catch up or catch on ten or twenty years from now. Until then, he's still evolving. Or not. You have your own thing going You picked a skittish childish and stuck him past the natural expiration date. You got a problem and I won't venture a guess as to what it is. Suffice it say: you have no idea what a relationship is. Accept reality: it can't be fixed. You can put in a few more bumpy years until you finally wear yourself out or you can cut your losses now. How to break up: Tell him you TWO have been trying for years and still haven't gotten it right. So you're moving on. Then, wish him a nice life and stay the hell away from him. don't blame him. don't rehash the past for the umpteen-thousandth time. REALIZE it doesn't work. REALIZE it sucks to keep getting dumped by an over-sensitive asshat who can't communicate and won't even buy you lunch. When you're TRULY done with him you won't need to point fingers or write a book. You'll be sick of obsessing about this icky, sticky mess.. I'd dump your therapist too. It's ridiculous you haven't received common sense feedback. The absurdity of these theatrics should have been driven home years ago. It's lunacy for you to keep hoping a pouty uncommunicative grow up overnight. bbw for an honest professionalwhen I'm not getting though to them, is to change the subject, and talk to them, find out a little about them. to find another way to talk and explain things to them. I"m sure its not easy to teach or learn something, a person not have ADD, it might be the way things are being said, or taught. just an idea. in my job, with Music, i deal with the public all the time, I'm always open to being flexiable. if it works, it works if it doesn't. eh..what can be done about anyway. Things-Other-People-Do-or-Say british dating
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