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ca65 looking for one nice sexy ladyyour forehead, "Victim Here". So you want to be a submissive? That's awesome, a D/s relationship can be very fulfilling. don't know where to start? Well, start by slowing down just a bit, there are some things to learn first to make sure your experience is a safe and happy one. The first DON”T: don't make a post saying you're a new submissive/slave looking for a Dom/Master, or submissive/slave training. Geez, that scares the hell out of me! While I have found the vast majority of the kink/BDSM community to be wonderful people, there are always going to be the dodgey sort in any community. As much as I hate to admit it, they inhabit the kink community too. There are McDoms (and McDommes) out there. They count on you not knowing the difference between BDSM and. They count on being your only source of “the one true way”. If anyone starts telling you “if you were a TRUE submissive, you'd (insert act here)” spit in his eye, and run like hell. The questionable ones count on you not knowing enough to them on their crap. You have the right to your own limits, and a Dom should always respect that. You decide between the two of you (or more, if that's your dynamic) what is and what is not acceptable. Any Dom/Domme worth their salt has the best interests of their sub in mind. They practice the "camp ground" philosophy to leave their sub in as good or better a condition than they found them. There is a lot of responsibility to being a Top/Dom, and make sure the one you choose is capable of that responsibility. Your submission is a gift. Make sure your Dominant is worthy of this gift. And listen to your gut, if it feels off, take that feeling seriously. don't put yourself in dangerous situations. The first DO: DO learn as much as possible. Learn what BDSM is and what it isn't. There are two basic philosophies of BDSM, SSC and RACK. Safe, Sane and Consensual, and Risk Aware Consensual Kink. I'd suggest you stick with SSC until you learn enough to make a truly informed decision on the risks you're willing to accept. Learn from as different sources as possible, the wider the better. single parents dating
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