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a woman who is a stay at home mom can't be both independent and strong? I don't think I'm following. Everyone wants to feel 'needed'/'wanted' in some regard, but do you think perhaps you take it too far and choose partners who aren't actually a good match for you? For example, have you considered that a stay at home mom might also like to start her own home business. Or that an 'independent' might decide she'd like to stay home? What I'm saying is that what you're hoping for isn't mutually exclusive. You just need to strive for a balance. Find a partner who is happy with herself, and wants a partnership with you. Dependence on you isn't going to keep a woman from leaving. You being an amazing person and good partner is what keep a woman from leaving. What makes her happy? What makes you happy? An emotional trainwreck might need you, but eventually you'll get tired of the drama because you can't 'fix' it. A woman who only wants a career but not a family (and you want a family) isn't going to work. looking for a cuddle buddy for after workWe met online and lived 8 hours away. So we saw each other on weekends. We talked for hours and hours on the phone and I thought I knew him. I kept journals throughout the years (7) and I am loathe to admit I saw the red flags but wanted so badly for him to be the one Years of therapy later, I can that my "learned helplessness", codependency and tendency to be a loving doormat were very attractive to an emotionally immature, controlling, outwardly arrogant but inwardly insecure with an inadequacy problems. Oh, and blond hair and big boobs probably didn't hurt. Now that I'm growing due to counseling, back in school and becoming more educated (psych, doesn't it figure?), the balance of power is shifting. We are a good match for some sort of odd friendship, but probably not marriage. As easy as it is to when someone needs to leave a marriage, I am finding it very difficult myself to take that plunge. I was single and lonely before but there is a difference. I am sparkly, not being conceited, it's just reality, but I attracted narcissistic princes back then. Hopefully, I won't anymore I think I'd rather be divorced, lonely, healing and available than married, intermittently miserable, lonely and unavailable for something better. blonde women
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