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-people who identify as bi based on but have never had a same sex relationship I know someone like that who is very apolitical and it only takes a few experiences or relationships to politicize an identity but it does take a few. I've had a few bad experiences as a bi person including one involving physical violence that make me realize there is a double standard even though I still benefit from it. I read an essay that suggested the double standard ( the glaring inequality in the way our relationships are valued and the way we are treated) is actually something that fires up some openly bisexual activists. If you think of people like Califia or Rockway there's a demand for equal treatment that could be seen as a positive side effect of straight privilege or straight entitlement. You experience the way straight people or straight relationships are treated and the disparity makes you angry and then you demand the same treatment all the time. It could go both ways. The ability to pass and unequal treatment might make some people want to pass to get the better treatment. But it might also drive other people to demand equal treatment no matter what. That's why I'm skeptical of identity politics. Because the experience of being perceived as having different identities ( bi people, trans people, gender conforming or "passing" people) might in some cases actually politicize some people even as it makes others apolitical. seeking female or male tonight fun only
get a JOB and damn fast someone please correct me where I'm wrong!: You have health benefits for now, lousy as they are, it's better than nothing. You'll have to take leave from work for surgery and recuperation. you get back to work within a month? I don't think so. So that means you'll have to pay for your health benefits out-of-pocket. How much of your premium does your employer pay???? If you don't pay this FULL premium (including your employer's portion of the payment) for subsequent months you're off work, your health benefits cancel. Then you'll have a lapse in coverage. You do NOT want a lapse in coverage!!! Even if your DH gets a job somewhere during that time, WITH benefits, you won't automatiy be signed on and receive full benefits (because you had a lapse in coverage AND you have a pre-existing condition). There'll be a waiting period I forget how, 6 months, 12 months, something. They can't deny you for a pre-existing condition, but they don't have to enact your coverage on day one (of his eligibility with the new job, usually 90 days), either. As far as I understand the current laws, the only way you can maintain coverage with no lapse, is if you KEEP your coverage for a few months yet, HE gets a job with benefits, and you don't need to use that new coverage until he's past the 90-day probationary period with his employer. His new insurance must go into effect no more than 30 days after yours cancels. Play it safe, and make them overlap. (When this happened with DH, he'd been paying $ /mo for coverage. His employer paid the other $ /month. We got damned lucky his employer listed him as "approved leave" rather than FMLA on their records. As such, they continued to pay the premiums for the six months he was off work.) professional male seeks latin femalejust stop all contact with the mystery woman. If you feel you're "broken," what makes you think you're in any position to be in a relationship with anyone? She wants to change but the continues because you accept it. I can't imagine a counselor wouldn't have advised both of you about this, unless you're not sharing a detail about YOUR behavior??? Draw your boundary and tell your wife what you no longer put up with or you have to walk away. She has to know the consequences. But whatever you choose to do, sneaking off to have emotional sex with your old flame is deceitful and the wrong way to leave a relationship. The emotional footprints you leave behind have a ripple effect on others in life and you have that on your conscience. If you're planning to end the relationship, do it with and dignity. Start a new relationship after you've healed and done you're "me work." web cam sex
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