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Hi again all, So much has happened since my last post and all for the good. But now I am here on advice for making a smooth transition to the next step. We are spending much more time together both alone and as a family (his mine) and although he and I are ready to make the "move in together move" it is probably just not best yet for the involved. Ok for my daughter who is going into the 8th grade. We have listened to her concerns and wants and we have agreed to wait until next (YIKES almost a whole year) to actually officially make the move. The time probably go quickly anyway as I we both have places (him house, me condo) to prepare. My questions: Ideas on getting everybody (him, me, -) use to the idea of "us as a whole" vs. the ME syndrome that we all seem to share. We all agree this is what we want, but we have also been independant for 7 years now. By the time we actually offiy make the move, I would it if everyone referred to "things" (the house, cars, furniture) as ours instead of mine, his, and hers. Also, if all others feelings were involved in decision making and plans. He and I are already very much working on this one. We sat down with each other's finance over the weekend and make term plans. He and I also discussed what needed to be done to each house and how we were going to get those things done. However, it bothers me very much (even though this is new) when SO refers to "my house" or "my car" or "my -" vs. "our house/car/-" When I bring this up, he graciously admits to understanding and trys harder, but what a ideas on how to ease him and especially our into the "Our/Us" stage instead of the "Me/Mine" stage. Those who know me, this is not a stressor, I am not worried, I have plenty of time to work through all of this. I am just looking for ideas on how to make the transition easier for all involved. I am confident that in the run, things work out beautifully. Just looking for suggestions or ideas to make the transition smoother!! Thanks! nsa tonight Moon Townshipwould you not bring up this matter as part of the divorce? If she owes you money then you should try to get that money in one way or another. Are there material assets, furniture, real estate, stocks? I would include this in the divorce. That is what you pay lawyers for. Let them deal with this issue. Or you could make an agreement with her seperatley and then have it notarized ex: she agrees to pay you /month until it's paid off or something. Why such a short marriage? None of my business, but personally I would ask her for or that debt and it a wash. If she isn't able to cause anymore financial issues for you, then take what you can get and wipe the slate clean. Sometimes you just have to let some things go. Also remember that you can't get blood from a stone! find girlfriend online
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