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and so i have to leave a shitload out of my life. and i used to be so close to her. and it's just hard now. sometimes our relationship was more like sisters than mother daughter, prolly cuz i wasn't raised by her, but by my grandmother. oh well you're gone, we can talk abt this laters. bbw clubs in tallahassee flhave any roots in my childhood experiences, but the mental definitly does. My parents were very heavy on praising us but also ruled us with guilt for failing or disappointing them mostly mind gimes. i have an older brother who would emoitionally and psychologiy us (i have 2 sisters)..he was horrible and everyone feared him-even my parents so i've always had this thing about intimidation and for years i intimidated others, but now discovering my submissive side, i'm letting go allowing myself to feel that vulnerability again..that control, and it is helping me grow, as a person. and i think it is helping me deal with all of those issues from my past because i know i can stop it i know it's not done to hurt me dating married man
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