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there wouldn't be a second date ;-) I think it's unreasonable as hell to put that on someone on or before the first date and you might have to kiss a few frogs first. Your interests aren't the only ones that matter his interests are just as important. I think if you pay attention you can figure out whether someone's serious. I personally would be a little weirded out by having this kind of discussion even at date six. Here's a short (and not all-inclusive) list of things I'd be working out before I was ready to discuss marriage and a family 1. Most important, is she a nutjob or just pleasantly quirky? 2. What about her moral compass? Is she honest? Is she as nice to the waiter as she is to me? 3. Does she know how to laugh? Does she know how to laugh at herself? 4. Is she self-aware? Committed to self-improvement? 5. Do we stimulate each other intellectually? 6. What about spirituality? Do my beliefs and hers fit together? 7. Are we sexually compatible? (This one takes awhile as most people can honeymoon well.) 8. How does she react when the going gets tough? Okay. Once I get the answer to all of those then I'm ready to discuss commitment. I'm guessing this probably doesn't line up with the biological clock ticking away, pinkytoe but a good relationship takes time and work. If you brought up marriage and on the first date I'd be one of those who ran away screaming as you'd just flunked #1 ;-) in there - swinger chatroulette in Trafford PennsylvaniaNow, it is (though not perfectly but) much, much clearer to me what you want/need! My situation is similar to yours, and it's somewhat pathetic, but yours is way worse. Although, I believe that everyone caries the load according to their strength. Well, if it was over your strength, you wouldn't be carrying it! So my point is, you probably have a philosophy of some sort that makes it all tolerable or worthwhile. The simple fact that you are still with your wife, proves that every other known to you alternative is much worse that your present situation. At this point, I can't advise or suggest you anything. But I believe that if you listen to your heart, you'd know what you should do, if you should do anything different from what you are doing at all. love sex friendship
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