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It was my understanding, from a conversation with a family law attorney friend from college in upstate NJ, that NJ law was a bit different in the no-fault department in that proven adultery provided an edge. Just out of curiosity, under what circumstances would an adultery case be changed to ID lack of proof? And while I know you can't "kick someone out", I guess I should have been clearer about encouraging the OP to stand his ground and not allow himself to be pushed out the door for her convenience. He can't physiy kick her out but he can certainly make it uncomfortable for her to stay, as as he stays calm, non-abusive and doesn't involve the. I very much agree with your earlier comment there's a lot here that we don't know in terms of the marriage. Two-year affairs just don't happen. my 42701 in the milf chatI don't understand much of your post, but I want to try to help. You say you're looking for an LTR and you've been finding men to date who "seem to resonate with your new found energy." Yet: "I cannot find men around my age with who want a term relationship." And men w/out make you suspicious: "I need some assurances on why would these men were never married in the first place or had families" You think there's something 'wrong' w/ the men who've never been married and/ or had -; there's something wrong w/ the men who've been there/ done that, but don't want those things/ an LTR with you. In this logical loop, there's something wrong everyone even you!: "I cannot think like a. My thinking is little clouded because I am a woman." Frankly, I don't know any woman who'd ever say such a thing (esp. not one in her 40s but I'll remit my back-burner inklings, re: your gender ). Your 'perceptions' are deceiving you. Forget the self-betraying mess about maturity/ immaturity/ age; forget about (existent or not); forget marriage. These ideals/ 'plans' are disallowing you from getting in on the ground floor w/ these men. You come in w/ too preconceptions, jumping too far ahead in your mind. In this way, you cut these men (and yourself) off at the knees, and ultimately fall back on your old 'flight'-oriented habits (though they're manifesting in a new configuration, they're still there). Get to know the men you date think of them as new friends. Spend time, talk to them about their/ your interests, feel them out, and get a sense of their attitude. Learn about them on their own terms. don't try to define them based on airy nothings. And avoid discussing term goals, past relationships/ residual fears in the early mtgs. (It could be that the once-married/ men who have sniff you out as a desperate ring-seeker.) Keep interactions in the present. european dating
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