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diabetic (no insulin type 2 diabetic) quite overweight and it's amazing that he has not given himself a heart attack or something when he flys into one of his rages. I have seen a couple flared nostrils, red faced and pounding his hands on the table. The wife says he has never hit her, but she is not the type who would ever tell. He demands the attention all the time. They go where HE wants to go, the HE wants to, watch the TV shows HE chooses, etc. My friend ( his wife's sister) lives alone in peace and quiet and literally hates visiting them (they live in another state) because she cannot stand his rants and raves. They took her on a couple trips but he screamed the whole time (missed an exit, whatever) He has NO tolerance at all for even the slightest little thing that goes wrong. off today any takers i give good massage too
Romance is something you both create. Maybe in previous decades (or centuries even) the roles were more defined. But today's roles are very different. Could you be latching onto the a fairytale ideal of the past and expecting him to fulfill it in the present. You have listed very good qualities in describing him. You say you split everything. I assume you like it that way? Why hold him accountable for the romance part? Romance spawns romance. Are you doing your part? Communicating your for romance is different than simply telling him how he falls short. Maybe this is one you have to model in your behavior, rather than doing it verbally and risking him viewing it as an attack. How would you feel if he told you he had hoped you were a size 6 instead of an 8 or he'd like you to get rid of the sweats and dress better at home? I'm sure plenty of people here tell you to lose him. don't settle. You'll never change him. My advice is to give him a. Do your part to cultivate the atmosphere you want. if he responds. Give it some time. Certainly don't him until you are satisfied that he is the guy for you and you can live with his shortcomings. But 7 months? You really don't know him yet. sexy ladies of Greensboro North CarolinaI'm sure he knows his behavior was poor. Even if he still stands by everything he said as justified and doesn't know just how horrendous and hurtful. Probably his overall complaint is that, b/c I do not behave as he would like within the family/don't make the same decisions or have the same communication and relationship style, I "stress" him out. My (- dwindling and believe me now stopped completely) being a component of that stress apparently. Stress and/or guilt making him so angry and his life a living hell, at least when it has anything to do with our family/mother, as he tells it. He cites dealing with her as the main reason he had a heart attack a couple years ago. So while I might ordinarily state the facts with someone and let them handle it and the chips fall where they b/c we're all adults and responsible for ourselves my brother is not an adult and can not handle himself in this way. I certainly don't want to perpetuate the problem by enabling the behavior. I'm not about to bounce along and pretend it's all good. Or try to "fix" his problems or just behave the ways he wants me to. But at the same time, I don't want to trigger stress, guilt, fury, God forbid another heart attack. I know I am not responsible for how he handles himself. But I also know he is not so far psychologiy able to handle himself better. That's just the plain facts. So that leaves me wondering how to behave intelligently given the situation and that this is a family relationship I probably always maintain at least on some level. female seeking females
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